Forum Archives

Return to Forum List

Intentional Stupidity...Frustrating

You are not logged in. Login here or register.

Phoenix1 posted 9/23/2013 12:39 PM

POS is supposed to start sending CS beginning October 1. I have agreed not to get CSE involved as long as he pays as he is required to do. Thus, payments will be sent directly to me. POS sends an email this morning asking if the payment should be made out in DD's name...

He knows full well it goes to me, but this is his way of playing little games. He didn't seem to have any problem sending secret unofficial support to OW#1 for OC#1 directly to her for 15 years, yet now he has to play these stupid "I'm an ignorant ass" games. Then he finishes his email with a quip about keeping the emails civil blah, blah, blah.

Here is why it is so frustrating. I keep strict NC unless absolutely necessary or he asks a specific question that actually requires an answer. I DON'T WANT TO TALK TO HIM, yet his stupid question about the CS requires a response, for obvious reasons. Just send me the money you owe, jerk off, and quit with the games!!

One missed payment and off to CSE I will go!!!

Oh, and remember the whole PO Box issue? Well, he said (in same email as above) that because he still co-owns property in this state (referring to the marital home) he will use that box as his mailing address. More fucking stupidity and head games. Hey asshole, since you seemed to have a memory problem, let me refresh it. You quitclaimed the property to me and it is awarded outright to me in the divorce settlement! You don't co-own DICK in this state!

Save me from these NPD assholes who believe they are smarter than everyone else and can "play" the system to their advantage....

[This message edited by Phoenix1 at 12:40 PM, September 23rd (Monday)]

Nature_Girl posted 9/23/2013 12:50 PM

Housefulloflove posted 9/23/2013 13:01 PM

One missed payment and off to CSE I will go!!!

This is my motto. I've already got their number programed into my phone!

I'm sorry that POS is playing games with CS. He obviously is as stupid as he is pretending to be but doesn't know it.

chikastuff posted 9/23/2013 13:05 PM

Question, why are you not going through CSE? Honestly, it's for the best of everyone involved. I would go to them regardless of what your agreement is/was.

peridot posted 9/23/2013 13:09 PM

I would go ahead and get an application, fill it all out except for the date. Then when he's late all you have to do is turn it in.

Phoenix1 posted 9/23/2013 14:02 PM

Question, why are you not going through CSE?

Because I agreed not to as long as he fulfilled his financial obligations and, unlike him, I honor my word. But if he misses one or is late, the agreement is null and void. I can sign up with them at any time (yes, I have already contacted them to find out the process).

I would go ahead and get an application, fill it all out except for the date. Then when he's late all you have to do is turn it in.

Already done this!

[This message edited by Phoenix1 at 2:05 PM, September 23rd (Monday)]

justabrokendream posted 9/23/2013 14:08 PM

Having CSE do the deed takes any games and ego's out of it.

SBB posted 9/23/2013 18:17 PM

I insisted on going through CSA from the get-go. Protection for both of us.

I will never enter into a handshake agreement with him again - parasites don't have hands!!

I understand you want to honour your agreement - I would feel the same way.

I have a feeling he will unburden you of this pretty quickly.

Is his name off the title and mortgage on your home?

Ignore the PO Box issue - what he does or what lies he tell to the Post Office are no longer your concern - it is none of your business. Remove yourself from the crazy.

Phoenix1 posted 9/23/2013 18:38 PM

Is his name off the title and mortgage on your home?

Title, yes, as the Quit Claim has been filed with the Recorder's Office. Mortgage, no, because our agreement states that it will remain joint until I am able to refinance with the same or better interest rate as what we currently have, and he has no claim on the property or equity in said property. Thanks to him fucking me over financially with his excessive spending habits, he has destroyed my credit and ability to refinance at a good rate. At least for the time being. So he is still legally responsible for the mortgage if I default on payments since the mortgage company does not recognize a divorce settlement (no different from joint credit cards), but he has no legal claim to the property itself.

I don't care about the box, it just amazes me that he really has himself convinced of his own delusional reality.

StillLivin posted 9/23/2013 18:43 PM

My STBXH does stupid questions too. Not CS related, but same concept. He sends stupid quesitons about finance stuff that he already knows the answer to.
You didn't promise to hold his hand during stupid time.
I stay NC when it is a dumb question. He KNOWs he will be in contempt of court and he KNOWS what I will do!
Stupid questions get ignored.

caregiver9000 posted 9/23/2013 19:13 PM

I agree with StillLivin. Stupid questions don't get answered. Actually, what makes you his version of "google" anyway? He can call CSE and ask if he really wonders.

And if he sends the check made out to DD, then your agreement is null and void and off to CSE and no further games on this subject.

You can't fix stupid and you can't reason with it.

Return to Forum List

© 2002-2018 ®. All Rights Reserved.