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Stabbed in the heart. Again.

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ddame23 posted 9/23/2013 13:24 PM

My WH is a musician and I took my son to see WH play at a fundraiser this weekend. I met the partner of one of WH's bandmates for the first time at the event. I introduced myself to him saying, "Hi, I'm ___, WH's better half. Nice to meet you." He shakes my hand and replies, "You're not the girl he brought last time." I felt my gut drop. I shattered. I wanted to go home then and there but I was stuck as we came in one car. I had to spend the next 4 hours pretending like I hadn't been stabbed in the heart, and the rest of the weekend pretending like I was ok when I just wanted to die.

brokendancer7 posted 9/23/2013 13:46 PM

I'm so sorry. That awful adrenaline/stomach wrenching/heart stopping moment is something nobody should have to feel.

Was this a new shock? Did you ask your H about it?

yousaid4ever posted 9/23/2013 13:46 PM

((((ddame23))))) I'm so sorry, my heart is hurting for you. That is the most awful feeling. I hate hate it!!!

catlover50 posted 9/23/2013 14:03 PM

Well that was a damned insensitive thing to say! Ouch.

I'm so sorry.

I was uncomfortable for awhile going to my H's work place since the LTA started there and everyone knew (I assume). I just decided finally that they all like me and if they think anything it's that he was crazy to do what he did.

My heart goes out to you.

Tred posted 9/23/2013 14:04 PM

I'm with brokendancer - did you discuss this with your H?

Tearsoflove posted 9/23/2013 14:06 PM

My husband had a friend who made jokes like that all the time. I hope that's what this guy was doing. It's not funny but some people are just really insensitive.

Raven96 posted 9/23/2013 14:15 PM

I'm hoping Tears is right, especially since you SAID you were WH's better half. Does this bandmate know what WH did? He might have just been thinking he was being funny (albeit stupid) because he DOESN'T know. Did you talk to your WH about it?

Sending hugs your way and really hoping it was just a stupid comment/joke.

iwillNOT posted 9/23/2013 14:19 PM

I'm so sorry! How horrible!

(((ddame23)))

Breathe, hug your son, do something loving for yourself...

Can you ask/tell your husband about this? At the very least he should know how this has hurt you.

Josephine01 posted 9/23/2013 14:25 PM

What did Mr.ddame23 have to say about this? Are you going to do some snooping before you tell him? Do you think that tears might be right?

SoOver96 posted 9/23/2013 16:17 PM

What did WS say when you confronted him

ddame23 posted 9/24/2013 03:14 AM

Thanks for all the kind words. I did talk to WH and we think the guy was just making a bad joke, but it didn't hurt any less.

TrulySad posted 9/24/2013 10:20 AM

"You're not the girl he brought last time."

What if he was trying to tell you something he thought you would want to know? Some people aren't the best at delivering bad news. I wouldn't be quick to brush this off.

And I'm so sorry. I know how it feels to have someone drop a bombshell on you, and a child is there, so all you can do is attempt to fake it, till you can crawl into the nearest available hole.

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