I'm sorry you are hurting.
I feel like you are maybe getting stuck on this whole "confrontation" thing. Is there a way to change your perspective to make yourself feel better and more confident about this? Maybe instead of "confronting" him, you can talk to him... communicate with him... write him a letter. Communication is critical. Maybe, like you said, your husband has no clue how much you are hurting. He might need some direction with that.
Therapy or not, you have us to lean on. Hang in there, and keep posting. Others will be along to help as well. Take care.
[This message edited by LosferWords at 5:15 PM, September 25th (Wednesday)]
I agree with losferwords. Dont think of it as confrontation. Go slow.
He's been wonderful? Then take advantage of that.
Can you arrange a quiet evening for the two of you? Jot down 2-3 things you would like to talk of for that time frame?
Please, dont worry about one drink. Enjoy it, relax.
I dont know why any of us need to hear what we logically know, but we do. It helps us to process the hurt.
It isnt about you having balls, woman , its about you not wanting to hurt. Take it in really small steps. Only what you can tolerate.
I understand and feel the same sometimes. I have no advice on how to not be afraid, other than if that's what we need to move forward, we have to do it.
Really, if you want to be healthy and happy, you have no choice. Just take bits in at a time.
You can do it.
Are there mental health clinics in your area that have sliding fee scales? They may be able to help you.
Did you know that before anesthesia was invented, the only way to do surgery was by getting someone really drunk?
You are in EXCRUTIATING pain. We BSs have all been there.
Stop apologizing for 1 drink, have a 2nd.
Agree with the others, writing a letter may be the way to go.
As someone who has always had to juggle things around 4 kids, is there someone who can take them for a day, so that you & WH can have some time alone to talk?
Something about your tone makes me assume that you want to try to R. You two will need some time alone together to accomplish this. Try to make plans now about childcare.
Our youngest was 11 at the time of WH's A, so we did a lot of sitting in the car in the driveway to talk, so that the kids couldn't hear us.
Sending you strength & hugs