My youngest who plays on the golf team with her comes home one day this week and says her and some of the frshman volleyball and freshman golfers were sharing a bus to a practice and the volleyball girls were saying that my niece is dating a female volleyball player.
My niece has always been athletic, a bit of a tomboy, and very independent minded. She broke up with a boyfriend of almost 2 years this past spring. I would not be shocked, if she is homosexual, nor would it effect how anyone in my family treats her.
My question is do I say something to my sister? I would want to know if it were me, but I also dont want to start drama for any of them. Seriously I know for a fact she will be loved and acceppted by the whole big family, but if its not true, I dont want to start trouble.
She is a great kid, straight A, all honors, two sport senior, with pending acedemic, and sports scholarships to a major university. So do I leave that sleeping dog lie?
If she is dating a girl, she will come out when she is ready.
If the family would love her gay or straight why would it be creating problems to quietly talk to her mom about what was said.
3 boys: 11, 9, and 1.
B) She isn't being hurt or hurting another person.
I would leave this alone. Let's assume she is gay, "coming out" is a highly personal and stressful experience, especially for adolescence. It is her journey. Let her navigate it.
"In life, unlike chess, the game continues after checkmate." - Asimov
"Be patient and tough; someday this pain will be useful to you." - Ovid
Laughter will cure life's ills. Have you had your laugh today?
Put yourself in her shoes. :)
Just to add, my younger brother is gay and has yet to come out to my parents.
I would never dream of outing him. It's his decision, not mine.
[This message edited by Audrina at 5:04 PM, September 29th (Sunday)]
This could be crap that someone made up -- you know that highschoolers, especially girls, can be mean. It could be a misconception. It could be true. But none of that matters if you tell your sister and then you child feels like you repeated something they did not want repeated. So check with your kid first.
Is your niece a minor? If she's not and the other girl is... Then there could be issues.
Not issues I'd personally have a problem with... but the younger girls parents could take issue with it if it's discovered and your niece is over 18.
Other than that, I agree with Previous Posters... it's not your place to tell.
If she is gay, let her come out on her own timetable.
We grew up in a home where homosexuality was considered something normal, and very accepted. As a result we (my sister and I have always had gay friends). We had a close friend impacted by the early days of AIDS, and die far too young, and we had another commit suicide over his angst at being who he was an not being accepted by his family. So when I say we all would accept her, I know that to be true.
I also know that is my Niece is dating this girl, and she is happy that's all that matters. I also know that if she truly is gay, and has made that choice, it won't take her long to come out. She is very happy with who shee is, and takes no crap from anyone.
I guess since this is the first of hearing about it, I will not say anything, but if there is a running theme, then talk to my sister about it. We used to be much closer, but don't talk nearly as often these days.
Anyway thanks for the input and sage advice.