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Email spam question

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 Lonelygirl10 (original poster member #39850) posted at 3:38 PM on Monday, September 30th, 2013

My wBF gave me all his passwords, and I looked at his email this morning. He had a ton of emails in his spam folder from girls sending photos and asking him to hook up. They were obviously spam emails, and I know that they were not real emails or real girls.

My question though is what causes these types of spam emails? My initial thought was that it's from him looking a porn in the past, which I'm aware of him doing. But, I occasionally have opened porn sites on my laptop, and I've never gotten a single spam email like this.

So what causes these spam emails?

posts: 1803   ·   registered: Jul. 17th, 2013
id 6505873
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Ostrich80 ( member #34827) posted at 3:55 PM on Monday, September 30th, 2013

I think its from visiting those kinds of sites. I've never gotten anything like that in any of my emails. May be that its old inquiries.

BS..me
WS..him
Been with him over half my life
4kid
DD1 10-01-09 DD2 02-12-12 discovered it never ended
OW..nothing special. Just your average skank
Status..#$%@????

posts: 5738   ·   registered: Feb. 15th, 2012   ·   location: midwest
id 6505903
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 Lonelygirl10 (original poster member #39850) posted at 3:58 PM on Monday, September 30th, 2013

Would normal porn sites cause this (which I don't care about), or would it have to be hookup sites (which I care about)?

posts: 1803   ·   registered: Jul. 17th, 2013
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confused615 ( member #30826) posted at 4:00 PM on Monday, September 30th, 2013

My WH has gotten both kinds of spam..porn spam and hookup site spam.

He went to porn sites..and hookup sites.

However,it wasn't until he went to a hook up site that he got spam from hookup sites..so it's not something I think porn sites send out.

BS(me)44
FWH 48
4 kids
M: June 2001
D-Day: 8/10/10



..that feeling you get in your stomach, when you heart's broken. It's like all the butterflies just died.


posts: 15220   ·   registered: Jan. 15th, 2011
id 6505912
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missyb32641 ( member #35656) posted at 4:01 PM on Monday, September 30th, 2013

I get those messages on my computer and do not visit hookup sites. Spam bots send out these messages to every possible address. If you open the message it validates your address and you start getting more of the same types of mail.

ME: BS 43
Him FWH 45
Married 20 years together 22 at the time.
Working thru R.

posts: 277   ·   registered: May. 24th, 2012   ·   location: Florida
id 6505914
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 Lonelygirl10 (original poster member #39850) posted at 4:06 PM on Monday, September 30th, 2013

What is the difference between porn spam and hookup spam?

One of them says click here for my pictures. There are two about Russian brides, with a link to join a website. There's one with the subject of "I'm ___. I'm in town. Lets meet."

posts: 1803   ·   registered: Jul. 17th, 2013
id 6505919
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confused615 ( member #30826) posted at 4:12 PM on Monday, September 30th, 2013

The porn spam has a "name" like it's sent from someone..sometimes the name made no sense..."Umotia" and the subject line sometimes is nothing but some letters,or symbols..like,"H^O#T S@EXXY CH$E&ERLEAD*ERS." The hookup site spam is like you said,HI this is Monica,Im hoping to meet up tonight,I want sex."

As far as *I* know..there is a difference. I saw the porn spam for years..but it wasn't until he was cheating on me that the hookup site spam started popping up.

I have also only opened two of these..the porn spam WAS from a porn site..and the hookup spam that I opened WAS to a f*ckbuddy site. So, Im no expert..I only can base my answers on what I opened,and because I know there was never any hookup site span until the summer of 2010.

The Russian bride spam? I used to get that when I would search craigslist..I used to go in search of my WH..just in case. And that kind of spam would come in..and I'd get pop up ads,despite having an ad blocker.

[This message edited by confused615 at 10:14 AM, September 30th (Monday)]

BS(me)44
FWH 48
4 kids
M: June 2001
D-Day: 8/10/10



..that feeling you get in your stomach, when you heart's broken. It's like all the butterflies just died.


posts: 15220   ·   registered: Jan. 15th, 2011
id 6505926
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 Lonelygirl10 (original poster member #39850) posted at 4:21 PM on Monday, September 30th, 2013

Thanks Missy. He has a ton, but maybe he clicked a link once and that explains it.

posts: 1803   ·   registered: Jul. 17th, 2013
id 6505945
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 Lonelygirl10 (original poster member #39850) posted at 4:33 PM on Monday, September 30th, 2013

Never mind, I figured it out. I was posting here before confronting him, but he read it and sent me an email explaining.

posts: 1803   ·   registered: Jul. 17th, 2013
id 6505961
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TattoodChinaDoll ( member #34602) posted at 4:34 PM on Monday, September 30th, 2013

I don't get any stuff like that on my email account through my phone/internet/tv service. But I get that stuff on my AOL names. Recently I've gotten a lot of Russian bride spam and Facebook dating things. I also get penis enlarging emails...for ya know...the penis I don't have. I get the, "I have 40 billion dollars to move from Nigeria and if you give me all your info I'll give you a million dollars," spam a lot.

Could be what kind of account he has.

Me: 35
WH: 37 TimeToManUp
Married: 14 years, together 19 years
3 daughters: 12, 8, 6, and 2 angel babies (2013 and 2014)

D-Day: 12/21/2011
Confronted him: 12/22/2011

This is the most difficult thing I've ever done.

posts: 1841   ·   registered: Jan. 20th, 2012   ·   location: New Jersey
id 6505962
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confused615 ( member #30826) posted at 4:45 PM on Monday, September 30th, 2013

Im curious. What was his explanation?

BS(me)44
FWH 48
4 kids
M: June 2001
D-Day: 8/10/10



..that feeling you get in your stomach, when you heart's broken. It's like all the butterflies just died.


posts: 15220   ·   registered: Jan. 15th, 2011
id 6505979
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 Lonelygirl10 (original poster member #39850) posted at 5:13 PM on Monday, September 30th, 2013

Kind of embarrassing. When we first met, we had a conversation about fantasies. I shared the thought of a threesome. In his email today, he said that he had signed up on a site for the both of us then. He said just a login name, and that he didn't do anything further with it. But that the spam emails began then. He said he told me about it back then and I got upset, but I don't remember that part.

[This message edited by Lonelygirl10 at 11:14 AM, September 30th (Monday)]

posts: 1803   ·   registered: Jul. 17th, 2013
id 6506013
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confused615 ( member #30826) posted at 5:26 PM on Monday, September 30th, 2013

Does that sound like something you would forget?

I sent you a PM.

BS(me)44
FWH 48
4 kids
M: June 2001
D-Day: 8/10/10



..that feeling you get in your stomach, when you heart's broken. It's like all the butterflies just died.


posts: 15220   ·   registered: Jan. 15th, 2011
id 6506026
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Alex CR ( member #27968) posted at 5:41 PM on Monday, September 30th, 2013

I used to wonder this myself as H's spam box was full of hookup sites when he gave me passwords almost four years ago. I figured he had been to these sites while cheating and that's why the box was loaded with them.

Almost four years out and H's spam has an occasional hookup site now.. most spam emails are for financial investments, insurance and other dumb offers. I've been wondering if because he is not visiting those sites anymore and checking other sites for things like our 401 and insurance if spam email is a reflection of where cookies get dropped.

I don't know how it all works, but I think it's odd now the only hookup site showing up is "SeniorPeopleMeet" ....I thought about moving that one over to his inbox but decided not to tease him about his age.

BS Me 63
WS Him 64
Married 35
Together 41
DD 11/16/09
I can dwell in the negative or seek the positive...one road is lonely...the other teeming with life.

posts: 1861   ·   registered: Mar. 18th, 2010
id 6506041
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