SurvivingInfidelity.com Forum Archives

Lonelygirl10 posted 9/30/2013 09:38 AM

My wBF gave me all his passwords, and I looked at his email this morning. He had a ton of emails in his spam folder from girls sending photos and asking him to hook up. They were obviously spam emails, and I know that they were not real emails or real girls.

My question though is what causes these types of spam emails? My initial thought was that it's from him looking a porn in the past, which I'm aware of him doing. But, I occasionally have opened porn sites on my laptop, and I've never gotten a single spam email like this.

So what causes these spam emails?

Ostrich80 posted 9/30/2013 09:55 AM

I think its from visiting those kinds of sites. I've never gotten anything like that in any of my emails. May be that its old inquiries.

Lonelygirl10 posted 9/30/2013 09:58 AM

Would normal porn sites cause this (which I don't care about), or would it have to be hookup sites (which I care about)?

confused615 posted 9/30/2013 10:00 AM

My WH has gotten both kinds of spam..porn spam and hookup site spam.

He went to porn sites..and hookup sites.

However,it wasn't until he went to a hook up site that he got spam from hookup sites..so it's not something I think porn sites send out.

missyb32641 posted 9/30/2013 10:01 AM

I get those messages on my computer and do not visit hookup sites. Spam bots send out these messages to every possible address. If you open the message it validates your address and you start getting more of the same types of mail.

Lonelygirl10 posted 9/30/2013 10:06 AM

What is the difference between porn spam and hookup spam?

One of them says click here for my pictures. There are two about Russian brides, with a link to join a website. There's one with the subject of "I'm ___. I'm in town. Lets meet."

confused615 posted 9/30/2013 10:12 AM

The porn spam has a "name" like it's sent from someone..sometimes the name made no sense..."Umotia" and the subject line sometimes is nothing but some letters,or symbols..like,"H^O#T S@EXXY CH$E&ERLEAD*ERS." The hookup site spam is like you said,HI this is Monica,Im hoping to meet up tonight,I want sex."

As far as *I* know..there is a difference. I saw the porn spam for years..but it wasn't until he was cheating on me that the hookup site spam started popping up.

I have also only opened two of these..the porn spam WAS from a porn site..and the hookup spam that I opened WAS to a f*ckbuddy site. So, Im no expert..I only can base my answers on what I opened,and because I know there was never any hookup site span until the summer of 2010.

The Russian bride spam? I used to get that when I would search craigslist..I used to go in search of my WH..just in case. And that kind of spam would come in..and I'd get pop up ads,despite having an ad blocker.

[This message edited by confused615 at 10:14 AM, September 30th (Monday)]

Lonelygirl10 posted 9/30/2013 10:21 AM

Thanks Missy. He has a ton, but maybe he clicked a link once and that explains it.

Lonelygirl10 posted 9/30/2013 10:33 AM

Never mind, I figured it out. I was posting here before confronting him, but he read it and sent me an email explaining.

TattoodChinaDoll posted 9/30/2013 10:34 AM

I don't get any stuff like that on my email account through my phone/internet/tv service. But I get that stuff on my AOL names. Recently I've gotten a lot of Russian bride spam and Facebook dating things. I also get penis enlarging emails...for ya know...the penis I don't have. I get the, "I have 40 billion dollars to move from Nigeria and if you give me all your info I'll give you a million dollars," spam a lot.

Could be what kind of account he has.

confused615 posted 9/30/2013 10:45 AM

Im curious. What was his explanation?

Lonelygirl10 posted 9/30/2013 11:13 AM

Kind of embarrassing. When we first met, we had a conversation about fantasies. I shared the thought of a threesome. In his email today, he said that he had signed up on a site for the both of us then. He said just a login name, and that he didn't do anything further with it. But that the spam emails began then. He said he told me about it back then and I got upset, but I don't remember that part.

[This message edited by Lonelygirl10 at 11:14 AM, September 30th (Monday)]

confused615 posted 9/30/2013 11:26 AM

Does that sound like something you would forget?

I sent you a PM.

Alex CR posted 9/30/2013 11:41 AM

I used to wonder this myself as H's spam box was full of hookup sites when he gave me passwords almost four years ago. I figured he had been to these sites while cheating and that's why the box was loaded with them.

Almost four years out and H's spam has an occasional hookup site now.. most spam emails are for financial investments, insurance and other dumb offers. I've been wondering if because he is not visiting those sites anymore and checking other sites for things like our 401 and insurance if spam email is a reflection of where cookies get dropped.

I don't know how it all works, but I think it's odd now the only hookup site showing up is "SeniorPeopleMeet" ....I thought about moving that one over to his inbox but decided not to tease him about his age.