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Undefinabl3 posted 9/30/2013 10:38 AM

I am really not sure where this will go or how serious it is.

On saturday my kids spend the day with my mom. To calm my daughter down, my mom got out some beige nail polish and painted her nails for fun. My son wanted to as well because he's a jealous butt.

I didnt think anything of it, he's 4. It was a nice time with the 2 of them and my mom just ate up the attention.

Yesterday, i tried the same thing. I thought since it worked so well to calm her down, I would try - and it worked. Of course my son also wanted to get his nails painted like at grama's.

DH turned into a green ogre right before my eyes and in so many words stated that DS was never to have his nails painted ever again no matter what the color (or lack there of).

Apparently painting his nails will turn him gay.

I told DH needed to grow the F up and stop being such a homophobe and that painting a 4 year olds nails beige sure as hell wasn't going to make him gay.

But it really ticked me off you know? I could care less if my son is gay or straight. If he wants to date all the colors of the rainbow i could also care less.

I WILL care if who he is with treats him badly. I will care if his heart is broken.

I never really thought DH was racist, but i think he really is. He rarely (at least not in front of me) makes comments about different people infront of the kids, but he has in the past when its just adults.

Uggg....i never thought this was a fight i would have to fight - its 2013 people...get over the differences already!

lieshurt posted 9/30/2013 10:58 AM

Oh goodness, the classic "you'll turn them gay" argument. I've got some people in my family who think this way. You should have seen the looks on their faces when I told them my son was spending the weekend with my gay bff and his partner.

Actually, he's spent many weekends with them and I can assure you my now 16 yo son is not even close to being gay.

Darkness Falls posted 9/30/2013 10:59 AM

I don't even have kids yet but I can already picture the fit that my XH would most assuredly throw if I were to paint the fingernails of any boy of ours. Oh Em Gee.

I agree with you btw, and I don't see anything wrong with what you did. But my XH would be the same way, I know it.

lost_in_toronto posted 9/30/2013 11:07 AM

My nephews have their toes painted all the time. Their very hetro, hockey playing dad could care less. Maybe he'd care if it was their fingers, but I doubt it.

It really sucks when kids of either sex are taught that some things are off limits because of their gender. My daughter plays with trucks and dinosaurs and drives a Harley tricycle. Also she loves her kitchen, making cookies and having her toe nails painted. It's funny how 'tomboys' are considered cute but boys with dolls make people question their sexuality.

It would really bother me my WS reacted like your DH did. Sorry you have to deal with that.

[This message edited by lost_in_toronto at 11:09 AM, September 30th (Monday)]

Undefinabl3 posted 10/1/2013 07:23 AM

It really sucks when kids of either sex are taught that some things are off limits because of their gender.

And that is what gets my goat...he's totally ok with DD being gay, but DS can't...wtf?

Anyway...I try to tell DS and DD that different isn't bad, its just different.

And while they don't understand the statement, i tell them not to Yuck other people's Yum (as long as it's not illegal you know).

sigh

Lucky2HaveMe posted 10/1/2013 08:59 AM

I do day care. 3 yo boy came in today with bright nail polish. His sisters were doing nail polish. He just wanted to join the fun. No harm no foul.

He proudly shared his BEAUTIFUL nails with me as he walked in the door. Some men seem to think if their sons are anything less than macho that it somehow reflects poorly on them as a parent.

StillGoing posted 10/1/2013 09:26 AM

Our 7 year old likes his toenails painted. I don't care. I just look at it like he's an emo kid or something. I taunt them in the stores by telling them very loudly "OH COOL LOOK AT THIS HELLO KITTY BACKPACK" or "MY LITTLE PONY RAINBOW DASH HOLY SHIT THIS WOULD GO GREAT ON YOUR WALL" and they freak out because it's girl stuff. DAD STFU THATS GIRL STUFF I DONT LIKE THAT IT ISNT FUNNY.

As far as I am concerned it's about doing something fun with mama, and I am fine with that. The rest of their lives is star wars and guns and pirates and shit. There are worse things in the world than him turning into Captain Jack Sparrow because he decides makeup is fun.

eta:

I think it toenail polish turned people gay it would have long since been weaponized. Load that shit into some high explosive rounds and bring new meaning to the phrase "colorful response."

[This message edited by StillGoing at 9:28 AM, October 1st (Tuesday)]