BW - mid 50's WH - mid 50's
WH and I have been seeing a MC for the past 3 months.
She wasn't great, but we felt we were making some progress. She was good at trying to get us to communicate better, but did not deal with the infidelity.
Saturday was the last straw, she said, for the 4th time, you have to get past it. you have to forgive. He made a mistake.
He did not make a mistake, he made a choice. Bouncing a check is a mistake, getting a parking ticket is a mistake. Choosing to have an A is not making a mistake. It is a choice. I was LIVID. Session was done. I was done. paid my copay and left.
Does she address the 6 months of lies after DDay? Does she address the 2 years of lies? No. She calls it a mistake.
I am so done with her. WH agrees, and we are now looking for a new MC. He is slowly getting it. WH could tell I was upset. We went to lunch and talked. He understood my anger. He has been reading SI more, and actually sharing what he reads, what resonates with him.
He told me this morning before he left for work that he loved me and that I am important to him. I almost cried. I have been telling him for 7 months that I need to feel important, feel that I am a priority. He is starting to tell me, and show me.
I finally slept more then 4 hours last night. I hope this is a start of true R.
I hope he starts driving the bus, I need a break. He needs to take the wheel.
DDay - 3/2/13 - 2:07pm 2+ year EA/PA
TT until 9/02/13 - why do they do that?
Trust is earned, respect is given, & loyalty is demonstrated. Betrayal of any one is to loose all three.