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I looked at OW Facebook page again

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SoAngryAndHurt posted 10/1/2013 15:03 PM

Why? Why do I do it? It's effin killing me. Why can't I stop myself? She is so hideous!! Please smack me and tell me to stop looking.

Broken1Again posted 10/1/2013 15:15 PM

SMACK!!! STOP LOOKING!!

This is counterproductive to your R whether with your spouse or on your own (not sure what your status is) but regardless it is counterproductive!

SMACK AGAIN! (In case you were thinking about looking!!)

But seriously pretend that Fb keeps track of who is looking at your page. Do you want her to know how many times you look???? NO! So don't do it!

heartbroken2012 posted 10/1/2013 15:15 PM

I obsess over the OW as well. Its a hard habit to break...I am failing.

The OW was much older than me, old looking, frumpy looking, horrible hair cut, and so hill billie....I dont get it.

Lalagirl posted 10/1/2013 15:17 PM

Your d-day is recent? I understand so no 2x4s from me.

But you know it's a HUGE trigger, yes?

IMO, we sometimes torture ourselves...I cannot really say why...especially in the early stages of this crap. It's like a horrible car accident, KWIM?

Hugs...

Peaches2013 posted 10/1/2013 15:20 PM

I keep doing it too. The issue with me is we have friends in common, so she pops up occassionally. So I get to see her and her 2 million face/cleavage selfies. *sigh*

bionicgal posted 10/1/2013 15:22 PM

OK, I just did this. Why do I do it?
She was/is not the issue. She could have been anyone, and she doesn't mean anything to my H. (Anymore - he was foggy for a few weeks.) She is a waste of space in my brain, quite frankly.

So, why? When I see her ridiculous mug smiling for the camera, pretending her life is dandy, why does it make me so mad?? She is the facebook queen (totally obsessed, lives through it) and to be honest, I want tp post on her wall what a lowlife, broken person she is.


mainlyinpain posted 10/1/2013 15:23 PM

I equate it to when you have a sore tooth and you keep poking at it with your tongue.

For me the OW doesn't have a fb page that I know of but her adult daughter does and that is where I found my evidence and where there are still two years later, pictures of my husband. I am so afraid of my son or future grandchildren seeing these some day but I am powerless to remove them.

JanaGreen posted 10/1/2013 15:27 PM

I'm sorry. It is really hard not to look. Can you just block her? I know you can always unblock, but at least it's an extra step you'd have to go through in order to go down the rabbit hole?

Rebreather posted 10/1/2013 15:31 PM

So, why? When I see her ridiculous mug smiling for the camera, pretending her life is dandy, why does it make me so mad?? She is the facebook queen (totally obsessed, lives through it) and to be honest, I want tp post on her wall what a lowlife, broken person she is.

I think because no matter how much we KNOW the truth, the fact remains that this person is an interloper. She attacked you (general), your life, your financial security, the emotional well being of your children. If someone had broken into my house I would want retribution. I just think it is NORMAL. I am 6 years out and I couldn't give a shit about her, but I also wouldn't piss on her if she were on fire.

It's a dichotomy, man.

momwith2boys posted 10/1/2013 15:35 PM

I do this too. I blocked her and then yesterday after having her blocked for about two weeks I unblocked her. I know it can't be healthy that I do this! After I wished I didn't because there were pictures of her and her bs on a fun date night. Then I think why does she get to be happy while I am sitting here hurt and obsessing over her and the A. I have been very tempted to post on her page but what I think of her so all her Facebook friends will see that she isn't so perfect after all.

kickboxer posted 10/1/2013 15:44 PM

She stalked me for months...I had no idea. She was laughing at me, picking me apart, and finding satisfaction in every flaw. My husband fueled her with his words of affection and imaginary intimacy.

I understand...I keep tabs on OW as well. We're only about 12 weeks out from DD...maybe it will change one day, but for now I see her as an enemy to my family, and I don't trust enough to lose track of her yet.

mainlyinpain posted 10/1/2013 16:37 PM

Keep your enemies closer

cuppacoffee posted 10/1/2013 16:43 PM

Our d day was 4 months ago and I was repeatly checking out her FB and her bf because his was open. It made me so mad to see him talking about how happy they are and how awesome she is.

Last week I decided I did not need to see any of it because well I was madder at my husband last week than skankface. I haven't peeked at her since. I did hear she didn't get the jobs she applied for and that did make me smile though.

I feel your pain. It's hard to decide not to sit and look at her and wonder why her? Why was she worth so much to your husband to throw it away for some ass? But at the end of the day she wasn't nothing but some designer imposter perfume. She's only worth the $10 you pay for her whereas you are the real deal and cost more per ounce because you are beautiful inside and out. Your character is worth more.

lovedmesomehim posted 10/2/2013 03:14 AM

SMACK!!! STOP LOOKING!!
This is counterproductive to your R whether with your spouse or on your own (not sure what your status is) but regardless it is counterproductive!

SMACK AGAIN! (In case you were thinking about looking!!)

LOL! Broken1Again, where were you when I needed you?

I was so guilty of this and still have a slip up or two during my trigger season.

It's pitiful, because I started stalking her during the "mySpace" era.

wannabenormal posted 10/2/2013 03:29 AM

We look because we want answers, we are hoping to find something our WS left out.

You will not find them on FB or online anywhere.

Maybe OW is a complete hag (yay, we feel better) or she's not (ugh, we feel worse)...now what?

Bottom line - hag or beauty queen, OW has nothing on you, YOU are awesome. She is not and never will be.

sad34 posted 10/2/2013 04:18 AM

I've been so guilty if thAt. It makes it more real for me. Because I wasn't there while they were screwing it grounds me in a way. Then it just pisses me off and I want to scream because she gets to go along with her normal life and I'm depressed and staring at the fat loser.
Haven't done it in awhile though!!!
Good luck it's a hard habit to break! Hugs!!!

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