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Newest Member: BrnEyes777 (45750)

User Topic: Hold my hand!! Old leap
PhoenixRisen
35912
Member # 35912
Default  Posted: 8:55 PM, October 3rd (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Just signed up
Ugh
Just waiting for perfect match (probably an "engineer" from "Kansas" who is currently "building orphanages in Somalia" and then asks me to wire $2500 for airfare so he can visit me)

I joined because ex isn't on that site (yes I checked...unless he's lying about age...crap maybe he is on there) and because one if the profiles caught my eye :)

So I think I am ready. Been 2 years since we S- and D is finalized.

Well maybe seeing some "pokes" and "winks" will be entertainment on those lonely nights when my kids are with their dad. And who knows maybe ill meet someone and have a few fun evening out (beats laundry)

I won't hold my breath though

Any advice (or warning)???


Posts: 504 | Registered: Jun 2012
tryingagain74
♀ 33698
Member # 33698
Default  Posted: 9:07 PM, October 3rd (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

No advice-- just a good luck! I hope you find someone awesome.


BS (Me) 39
Happily liberated!
Two DS and One DD
It matters not how strait the gate,/How charged with punishments the scroll./I am the master of my fate:/I am the captain of my soul.--"Invictus," William Ernest Henley

Posts: 3644 | Registered: Oct 2011
PhoenixRisen
35912
Member # 35912
Default  Posted: 9:25 PM, October 3rd (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thanks trying ((hugs))
If I can dodge psychos I'll consider it a win
:)

Posts: 504 | Registered: Jun 2012
Must Survive
♀ 34533
Member # 34533
Default  Posted: 9:33 PM, October 3rd (Thursday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

PR,

I look at it as entertainment. And if I do get lucky and meet someone, added bonus!


Me BS
WS: Just a squished bug on the window of my life!
Divorcing, STBXH is engaged/living with OW#3

They have a choice: they can live in my new world, or they can die in their old one." — Daenerys Targaryen


Posts: 817 | Registered: Jan 2012 | From: Must Survive
timeforchange
♀ 27454
Member # 27454
Default  Posted: 12:26 AM, October 4th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Trust your gut... If you think a guy seems odd he is odd!!!!!!

I have tried OLD on and off for 2 years now.

I have been on 4 first dates and 3 turned into relationships - 2 lasted 3 months or so only but there are no regrets :)))

I just took time working out what wanted and what things did not work for me.

If you go on a first date please don't expect fireworks. The best advice I received was to ask yourself at the end of the date... Am I intrigued enough to go on a second date and get to know this person a little more?

I went on a date on 31 January 2013... And was intrigued by his wonderfully kind eyes. Tonight the owner of those amazing eyes will arrive to spend the weekend with me. Much as he has done eow since last winter!

He is a Single dad and we have our kids on the same schedule :))

Life is sweet


Me = BS aged 43
2 boys, 13 and 9
DDay 1/19/10
Confronted him 2/16/10
Finally Divorced 8/29/12

“We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.”


Posts: 726 | Registered: Feb 2010 | From: Expats in Europe
bigskyblues
♂ 36759
Member # 36759
Default  Posted: 2:36 AM, October 4th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

There are a lot of OLD horror stories out there so I guess I am one of the lucky ones. I only met/dated one lady from OLD. We have been together for 10 months now and I couldn't be happier.

One piece of advice I would give in addition to trusting your gut, is really scrutinize their profile. I would say put your detective hat on (I have been a LEO for 30sh years).

Look at the photo's there will be the obvious creeps that will stand out, but really look things over. I am not the party type. It was amazing to me how many women had their picture taken in a bar or casino, that was always a red flag for my life style.

The internet is your friend for detective work. If you progress to the point where you have a phone number Google it "(123)456-7890", Anytown State.

Quite often you will find info on them that way. You can also put the phone number in a Face Book search and sometimes come up with a page that way.

Also as soon as you get a name I strongly suggest you Google them as a free background check. If you do it like this: "John Doe", city, state it will make it easier. See if they have a Facebook page often that will give you some real good clues about who you are talking to.

Be safe! When you first meet pick a public place. Tell a friend, have them call you after an hour or so you can use that as a excuse to leave if things aren't going how you would like. Make the first meeting a short one like a cup of coffee or lunch so that it doesn't have to last long, if the chemistry is there you can always extend it by going for a walk afterwards etc.

I suspect it may be more challenging for women as there are a lot of creepy guys out there (no real shortage of creepy women either) but there are also a lot of good guys out there just take your time and trust your instincts.

Good Luck
BSB

[This message edited by bigskyblues at 2:42 AM, October 4th (Friday)]


BH 50s
xWW 50s

Dday1 7-2012
Dday2 8-2012
Divorce 9-2012

4 kids all adults.

Married 22+ years.

I have moved on and life is good!


Posts: 273 | Registered: Sep 2012
better4me
♀ 30341
Member # 30341
Default  Posted: 9:08 AM, October 4th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

In addition to those good safety tips...

Take the risk, be brave and send out emails of greeting, don't wait for the other party to make the "first move". And remember there are lots of "poofers", don't take it personally when communication suddenly stops.

And, when you feel comfortable, go ahead and make the first move to ask him out for coffee or lunch. I no longer spend weeks talking on line, I prefer to meet in person within the first week or so. Many of the men I've met wrote really lovely emails (I'm a sucker for good English) but were not a match in person.

Have fun! Even if you don't get the fairy tale, it can be a really good way to meet a new friend.

[This message edited by better4me at 9:09 AM, October 4th (Friday)]


DDay 11/17/2010 BW:53
Divorced

Posts: 3236 | Registered: Dec 2010 | From: Iowa
RyeBread
♂ 37437
Member # 37437
Default  Posted: 9:52 AM, October 4th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

lurking...

I didn't realize engineer's from Kansas were that shady. Maybe I should choose a different profession


Let him that would move the world first move himself. - Socrates

Posts: 1030 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: Midwest
PhoenixRisen
35912
Member # 35912
Default  Posted: 5:56 PM, October 4th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Rye- engineers from Kansas are completely honorable, esp if they build orphanages!
That is why that profile was used as a bait- at least that is what one woman said happened to her on OLD

[This message edited by PhoenixRisen at 7:31 PM, October 4th (Friday)]


Posts: 504 | Registered: Jun 2012
Topic Posts: 9

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