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Hold my hand!! Old leap

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PhoenixRisen posted 10/3/2013 20:55 PM

Just signed up
Ugh
Just waiting for perfect match (probably an "engineer" from "Kansas" who is currently "building orphanages in Somalia" and then asks me to wire $2500 for airfare so he can visit me)

I joined because ex isn't on that site (yes I checked...unless he's lying about age...crap maybe he is on there) and because one if the profiles caught my eye :)

So I think I am ready. Been 2 years since we S- and D is finalized.

Well maybe seeing some "pokes" and "winks" will be entertainment on those lonely nights when my kids are with their dad. And who knows maybe ill meet someone and have a few fun evening out (beats laundry)

I won't hold my breath though

Any advice (or warning)???

tryingagain74 posted 10/3/2013 21:07 PM

No advice-- just a good luck! I hope you find someone awesome.

PhoenixRisen posted 10/3/2013 21:25 PM

Thanks trying ((hugs))
If I can dodge psychos I'll consider it a win
:)

Must Survive posted 10/3/2013 21:33 PM

PR,

I look at it as entertainment. And if I do get lucky and meet someone, added bonus!

timeforchange posted 10/4/2013 00:26 AM

Trust your gut... If you think a guy seems odd he is odd!!!!!!

I have tried OLD on and off for 2 years now.

I have been on 4 first dates and 3 turned into relationships - 2 lasted 3 months or so only but there are no regrets :)))

I just took time working out what wanted and what things did not work for me.

If you go on a first date please don't expect fireworks. The best advice I received was to ask yourself at the end of the date... Am I intrigued enough to go on a second date and get to know this person a little more?

I went on a date on 31 January 2013... And was intrigued by his wonderfully kind eyes. Tonight the owner of those amazing eyes will arrive to spend the weekend with me. Much as he has done eow since last winter!

He is a Single dad and we have our kids on the same schedule :))

Life is sweet

bigskyblues posted 10/4/2013 02:36 AM

There are a lot of OLD horror stories out there so I guess I am one of the lucky ones. I only met/dated one lady from OLD. We have been together for 10 months now and I couldn't be happier.

One piece of advice I would give in addition to trusting your gut, is really scrutinize their profile. I would say put your detective hat on (I have been a LEO for 30sh years).

Look at the photo's there will be the obvious creeps that will stand out, but really look things over. I am not the party type. It was amazing to me how many women had their picture taken in a bar or casino, that was always a red flag for my life style.

The internet is your friend for detective work. If you progress to the point where you have a phone number Google it "(123)456-7890", Anytown State.

Quite often you will find info on them that way. You can also put the phone number in a Face Book search and sometimes come up with a page that way.

Also as soon as you get a name I strongly suggest you Google them as a free background check. If you do it like this: "John Doe", city, state it will make it easier. See if they have a Facebook page often that will give you some real good clues about who you are talking to.

Be safe! When you first meet pick a public place. Tell a friend, have them call you after an hour or so you can use that as a excuse to leave if things aren't going how you would like. Make the first meeting a short one like a cup of coffee or lunch so that it doesn't have to last long, if the chemistry is there you can always extend it by going for a walk afterwards etc.

I suspect it may be more challenging for women as there are a lot of creepy guys out there (no real shortage of creepy women either) but there are also a lot of good guys out there just take your time and trust your instincts.

Good Luck
BSB

[This message edited by bigskyblues at 2:42 AM, October 4th (Friday)]

better4me posted 10/4/2013 09:08 AM

In addition to those good safety tips...

Take the risk, be brave and send out emails of greeting, don't wait for the other party to make the "first move". And remember there are lots of "poofers", don't take it personally when communication suddenly stops.

And, when you feel comfortable, go ahead and make the first move to ask him out for coffee or lunch. I no longer spend weeks talking on line, I prefer to meet in person within the first week or so. Many of the men I've met wrote really lovely emails (I'm a sucker for good English) but were not a match in person.

Have fun! Even if you don't get the fairy tale, it can be a really good way to meet a new friend.

[This message edited by better4me at 9:09 AM, October 4th (Friday)]

RyeBread posted 10/4/2013 09:52 AM

lurking...

I didn't realize engineer's from Kansas were that shady. Maybe I should choose a different profession

PhoenixRisen posted 10/4/2013 17:56 PM

Rye- engineers from Kansas are completely honorable, esp if they build orphanages!
That is why that profile was used as a bait- at least that is what one woman said happened to her on OLD

[This message edited by PhoenixRisen at 7:31 PM, October 4th (Friday)]

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