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Eating Lunch Alone

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jrc1963 posted 10/5/2013 08:31 AM

This week I was at our School District's County off on Mon, Tue, Thur and Friday participating in a committee to elect/adopt our English Department Textbook for the next five years.

On Mon I ate lunch in my car while I ran errands.

Tue, Thur and Friday I ate alone... I didn't invite anyone to lunch and no one invited me.

This didn't bother me one bit... but it really upset FWSO a lot.

My question is... WHY??

So, I'm asking you all... Why do you think it bothered FWSO so much for me to eat alone?

inconnu posted 10/5/2013 08:43 AM

Maybe he sees it as you being excluded, you know, like the kid at school nobody wanted to sit with type thing, instead of understanding that it was your choice to be alone.

unfound posted 10/5/2013 09:04 AM

Agree with inconnu. Also, some people aren't comfortable eating alone, and can't understand that some people are. He might be transferring his uncomfortableness of eating alone onto you and doesn't want you to be uncomfortable.


jrc1963 posted 10/5/2013 15:55 PM

Maybe... It just confuses me!

persevere posted 10/5/2013 16:50 PM

I eat lunch alone all the time. Honestly, sometimes I prefer it that way. I'm with my co-workers in an open area all day - sometimes lunch is time for me to deflate a bit alone.

I'm not sure why it would bother him so much - what brings it up in conversation?

Jrazz posted 10/5/2013 16:51 PM

FWH hates to eat alone. I love it. I love going to breakfast alone - I love going to the movies alone.

I enjoy friends but sometimes company for the sake of company becomes more obligatory conversation than I can stand.

FWH is really uncomfortable when I want to fly solo, and I think it's because he's projecting how much eating/being alone bothers him. I'm codependent in some ways, but he's SUPER codependent and can't even be in a room by himself for long.

Perhaps your FWSO is projecting his own insecurities.

jrc1963 posted 10/5/2013 18:23 PM

I'm not sure why it would bother him so much - what brings it up in conversation?

Well, I texted him that I was eating lunch and he asked me if I was eating with people... I said, "no, alone" and he launched into how bad he felt for me.

I questioned him again today... and he confessed that he felt bad for me because of how much he hates to eat alone.

So it was projecting his own insecurities on to my situation.

StrongerOne posted 10/5/2013 19:47 PM

Send him this:

jrc1963 posted 10/5/2013 20:28 PM


Funny... Thanks.

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