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User Topic: Relationship Rescue by Dr. Phil
♀ 40617
Member # 40617
Default  Posted: 5:16 PM, October 6th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I was wondering has anybody read Dr. Phil McGraw's Book - Relationship Rescue - I have noticed it is featured to the left on the Home Page.

What are peoples' opinions on his book, helpful or not? Just wondering????

Posts: 95 | Registered: Sep 2013
♀ 39560
Member # 39560
Default  Posted: 6:52 PM, October 6th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

among the many different books I read after D-day, Relationship Rescue was one of them.

I liked it; provided down to earth advice and information. It is not about healing from infidelity but rather, as the name implies, how to improve the relationship between spouse or GF/BF. It gave me ideas on how to better effectively communicate.

Ideally it would be both parties involved in reading/doing the exercises Dr Phil outlines, but even if that is not the case, it helps to improve yourself. If you are not into self-improvement, don't choose this book.

Post D-day I began working on myself to improve my confidence, self-esteem, etc. the issues with WS became secondary but still needed addressed.

The book taught me better strategy for effective communication. Rather than yelling or arguing with WS, I approached it differently using Dr Phil strategy...almost as if less-was-more when talking with WS. there were times when I had to type it and then read it to WS to make sure all my points were covered. He began listening rather than just hearing blah-blah-blah coming from me. Since then WS has begun to see the light and though we have long way to go, taking steps in right direction.

If you've watched Dr Phil then you know his style; the book is written just like he talks, down-to-earth.

I read the copy from local library but wish I had purchased it so I could highlight/bookmark certain sections.

ETA: don't get me wrong, I wanted to yell and scream at WS after D-Day...but after reading the book and my other therapy I realized it would be a wasted effort, he would have simply tuned me out and given him "justification" for his actions and poor judgement.
Instead, since the beginning of this entire disaster I've conducted myself with a great deal of restraint and patience to the best of my ability. This was not an effort to show him how I've changed, but rather for myself, to know I conducted my own actions with honesty and integrity and did the best I could....regardless of the outcome.
My way won't work for others, just as other's wouldn't have worked for my situation. As they say you must take what works and leave the rest as each situation, though similar is not quite the same.

[This message edited by TheRealDeal at 9:02 PM, October 6th (Sunday)]

Me (BS): 47 him (Xws): 55
together 18 years
DDay1, DDay2, Dday 3: March - June 2013
Dday4 + June 2015 through January 2016
Status: done I called it quits 1-6-2016
The hardest part of letting go is realizing there wasn't much left to hold on to

Posts: 481 | Registered: Jun 2013 | From: Northeast
♀ 40617
Member # 40617
Default  Posted: 9:39 PM, October 6th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Thank you so much for getting back to me, it is appreciated.

Was wondering if it was worth buying and reading. I am familiar with Dr Phil's no nonsense approach and I realize it deals with the aspect of reconnecting with your partner rather than infidelity. I think I will read it for my own self improvement.

Thought it might be prescribed reading when it is featured so prominently on the home page.

Thanks for your insight, and good luck to you on your journey. This ain't NO picnic

Posts: 95 | Registered: Sep 2013
♀ 37107
Member # 37107
Default  Posted: 2:04 AM, October 7th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I read it. I found it good, but it didn't deal with infidelity. I have found other books that were way more helpful to me/us in terms of dealing with the aftermath of infidelity.

BS 49
Together 32 yrs, M 28 years
2 daughters 27yo(married with 2 children) & 21yo
D-Day 18 Aug 2012
6mth EA lead to 4mth PA with CO-W. I found out 8 1/2 yrs later

Posts: 1310 | Registered: Oct 2012
Topic Posts: 4

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