I have not posted here in quite a few months but this site has been invaluable to me, so I am hoping for some guidance.
I am still in the divorce process - our temporary orders give him time with the kids every weekend. I do not have a full weekend with them. My grandparents are out of state are very elderly and dying. They want to see their great - grandkids one last time. Taking them to visit means STBXH has to give me permission as it would be during some of his parenting time. I do not have enough consecutive time with them to make a visit without using some of his time. He will not agree. My attorney basically said if he does not agree I will be violating the custody order and he could file contempt on me, so I need to decide if it is worth it. I feel that it is. Is there anything I am missing? Any advice? Thank you so much in advance.
Also a good point to anyone else doing up their agreement; having visitation EVERY weekend can't work; both parents need to have a couple of uninterrupted time with the kids now and then.
I hope you can work it out.
WH says marriage is over: May 15, 2009.
EA#2 July 20, 2009. Legally sep: Aug 16, 2009. DIVORCED!!!! Signed Nov 23, final Dec 24, 2010, adultery listed.
His choice then is not to allow or deny you the time, but choose his option of making up the time.
If he gets ugly and threatens you if you go, then take him to court for his threats and his bullying.
I am sorry. This is an unfortunate situation.
If you are still working on your final orders, save all your emails re: you asking for the time and offering him a full weekend, and his referral. It will show him not willing to work with you, and you offering a good compromise.
I truly hope you don't end up with this schedule forever. Every other day is too hard on you, and on the kids down the road. He will find it doesn't work at some point too; just right now he knows he can hurt you by saying no.
Your parents don't get to tell you what to do. They clearly have NFI about what is at risk here.
Your small children seeing your elderly grandparents one last time is not worth risking losing custody or giving X any sort of advantage.
Custody is permanent. Those kids are your Number One priority and if your parents can't see that then they have rocks in their heads.
He is a piece of shit for doing this but it is a good reminder that they WILL do whatever they CAN do to stick it to us.
I am hoping your permanent orders are not every weekend. My girls are 5.5 and 3 and we have a 2//2/3 schedule which alternates weekends and also allows for all handovers to be done via daycare/school (one drops off on a Mon AM the other picks up after school.
Is it possible for someone in your family to set up the great grandparents with a Skype connection. Then your children could "see" their great grandparents on a regular basis.
I totally agree that your schedule is unworkable. You need to ask your lawyer to ensure your permanent orders are NOT based on these temporary orders. I have never heard of orders which don't ensure vacation time either. Please look into having these essential points changed in the final orders.
“We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us.”