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Poetry - The Creature

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pizzalover posted 10/10/2013 14:34 PM

I was sharpening pencils in my classroom this morning and my brain started writing this poem. Let me know what you think.

The Creature

In front of you
You see a creature
You don't quite recognize
They look the same
But have changed
Remnants of the past
Swirling around then like a cloud
Exiting their body
Becoming a new being
You rush to collect the scraps of what once was
But the smoke slips through your fingertips
You want to put the creature back together the way it was
But
It
Is
Broken
Can you rebuild? You wonder aloud
Your words drift through the air
As the sound collects in it's ears
It begins to change
Slowly...steadily
Into a new body
The goodness retained
But the sickness begins to leave
You see a new image
Improved
Real
Honest
The old left behind

Darkness Falls posted 10/10/2013 16:46 PM

I like it. Very heartfelt.

How have you been doing lately?

babbs posted 10/10/2013 20:14 PM

I enjoyed reading this. I can relate I feel like H and I are being real with one another now regarding our "wants". I hate what I did but I'm glad that in the end we are now able to say what we've been to polite and to afraid to bring up.

pizzalover posted 10/12/2013 13:27 PM

Thanks HB and babbs. I appreciate the nice words.

I'm doing as well as I can be. Life is tough as expected. I'm in IC 2x a week and MC once. I'm still trying to figure things out. It's been over 8 months and I'm still confused. It's no comfort to my BH.

My brother still wants nothing to do with me. My BH is visiting him this weekend at his new apartment an hour away. He thinks very little of me. It seems that everyone has come to some terms with what I've done except him. Even my brother-in-law who pretty much wanted nothing to do with me has done a complete 180. It's hard when family doesn't have your back. I don't expect him to accept what I did and everything to go back to normal but I would like some relationship. He feels that it's obvious that my BH should divorce me. He says logic should tell my BH what to do. My BH was almost not going to go see him thus weekend. My brother thinks I'm just an adulteress and that's it. I'm sad.

knightsbff posted 10/12/2013 14:03 PM

I like it too.

Improved
Real
Honest

PL,
I feel sad about your brother too. You know that his reaction to your infidelity comes from something within him, right? I think it's triggering some profound pain or fear within him. Something with his parents or an important relationship to him or something he doesn't want to face within himself. If he accepts that you are flawed but striving to change then he will have to come to terms with something else that he is unable or unwilling to face right now. I may be projecting but JMHO.

I know it hurts and I'm sorry.

(((PL)))

OK now posted 10/13/2013 05:15 AM

Very nice poem. Enjoyed reading quite a few times and I hope its your story.

SandAway posted 10/13/2013 07:40 AM

I really like it and I think it speaks volumes about a WS that is making changes to become a better person then who they were.

Well done

Hope the weekend is going OK for you~

pizzalover posted 10/13/2013 10:14 AM

Knights:

I feel sad about your brother too. You know that his reaction to your infidelity comes from something within him, right? I think it's triggering some profound pain or fear within him. Something with his parents or an important relationship to him or something he doesn't want to face within himself. If he accepts that you are flawed but striving to change then he will have to come to terms with something else that he is unable or unwilling to face right now. I may be projecting but JMHO.

You may be right. Growing up we were very close. Things changed when I went away to college. Then they got a little better. He lived with me for awhile before my BH moved in. We hung out for many years - me, my brother, my BH, my brother-in-laws, and a male friend of ours. I was the only girl. I often felt picked on by the boys. My brother was very antagonistic. He would push and push until I broke down. I would het really sad and frustrated because my BH never really defended me through the abusive behavior because he didn't want to get involved with a brother/sister fight. We started to work through our issues after New Year's Eve after he was completely out of line with his behavior. And then my world exploded and our relationship died in a way. I'm sure my suicide attempt really effected him like it did for everyone in my life that knows about it. I would love to have him at a therapy session with me but I'm not sure he'd agree to it. I hope that one day he'll come around.

Ok and Sand - Thanks for the nice words!

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