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Feeling like a chump (profanity)

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sunsetslost posted 10/10/2013 17:41 PM

I feel like a fucking chump right now. Why the fuck am I bending over backwards to give this bitch a house with 30,000 in equity in it. Every time I turn around its "can you check on this? How do I do this??" I am making alls, faxing, running around town looking for bank records I keep telling myself it's a means to an end but it's wearing on me right now. Truth is I'm going to drop a 100+ year old house on her that will likely ruin her financially. And I don't care. Fuck her and that shitty house.

I needed to get that out. Tentative closing November 4. Then the gloves come off.

StillLivin posted 10/10/2013 17:51 PM

Hang in there. Do what you gotta do and don't feel like a chump. The true chump is gonna be her.
It will get better and you will be financially free.

cayc posted 10/10/2013 17:54 PM

A chump is someone still taking care of that fucking house AFTER it's all in her name. A smart guy is someone dumping an big old house on their WW who has no clue what it takes to keep in good shape. And probably doesn't understand property taxes either.

GabyBaby posted 10/10/2013 18:00 PM

I'm with Cayc on this one!
Keep you chin up, especially with an end date in sight.

After the house is all hers, you're going to suddenly become unavailable to those demands.

jemimapd posted 10/10/2013 18:24 PM

I was in a similar non-infidelity related situation a while ago.

It really helped me to visualize the outcome. Imagine what you will do on the weekend after the closing. Something positive for you. A night out. A purchase for yourself. A trip somewhere. Something you have wanted to do for a while. Offer that to yourself as an incentive.

Somehow it helped me rise above the frustration of getting there.

[This message edited by jemimapd at 6:25 PM, October 10th (Thursday)]

ladies_first posted 10/10/2013 18:44 PM

Why the fuck am I bending over backwards to give this bitch a house with 30,000 in equity in it.

"36. Debt free. Cash in my pocket. Condo on the bay."

sunsetslost posted 10/10/2013 20:10 PM

She really is clueless. My favorite question : "What is my adjusted gross income?" The small and ever shrinking part does feel ok knowing she will be happy in her house. And when the shit hits the fan I won't care a bit anymore.

Thank you all. ladies_first, thank you for the reminder.

SBB posted 10/11/2013 03:49 AM

ladies_first nailed it. You're not helping her, you're making good your escape.

Ashland13 posted 10/11/2013 10:11 AM

One thing that's always helped me is to remember when I'm sitting alone every night and contemplating how I handled things, I strive to take the high road because I can live with peace in my mind knowing that I did.

When all is said and done, that will be my peace and some of my freedom. That I didn't do anything wrong, I stayed the course even if it means answering every question and more legal bills.

It's the rest of our lives to live and how we deal with things now plays a big part in that future.

And...think of her having zero, zilch, nadda, to hold against you, Sunsets.

When you next float along on that noodle, you can be conscience-free and your looking back time, if you do it, can be done with ease instead of worry and "what will she come up with next?"

Not leaving any ducks out of order can only ensure a peaceful ends to a very choppy surf.

sunsetslost posted 10/11/2013 10:54 AM

Ash,

You read my mind. I'm being civil, beyond civil for me. So I can hold my head high. So I can sleep at night. So that, in the future when I'm on a date on the beach and the inevidable questions come up I can say honestly that I was honorable, fair and walked away with a clear conscience.

Housefulloflove posted 10/11/2013 22:25 PM

A chump is someone still taking care of that fucking house AFTER it's all in her name. A smart guy is someone dumping an big old house on their WW who has no clue what it takes to keep in good shape. And probably doesn't understand property taxes either.

This. It's not a chump move it's a strategic move. Big difference. One puts her at an advantage at your expense the other creates the exact opposite effect. Think about the long term benefits while enjoying imagining how deep in shit she'll be before she even knows what is going on. It helps!

peridot posted 10/11/2013 22:57 PM

Just remember you are almost there.

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