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General :
movin to the city

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 Spelljean (original poster member #35624) posted at 12:08 AM on Friday, October 11th, 2013

Out of WH's neighborhood, which I stayed in thinking he would come around eventually. All he did was cake eat. He is still in the house, but we will either sell anyway or he will buy me out.

Anyway...finally my lease is up in the apartment which is about 1/4 mile from WH. Me and my daughter are taking a (very, very small) apartment in the city! I will be 3 miles from work only, there are tons of cafes and art galleries and everything to walk or bike to.

WH thinks I'm nuts for wanting the city life, but I'm excited. Not to mention being far away from him.

Yes its only about 600 square feet! So, maybe I am nuts. But its a new lifestyle and life.

WH: 41
me: BS, 45
Together 18 1/2 years, married 17
DDAY 8/2/12
OW: EA- friend of 4 months
Status: separated

posts: 1037   ·   registered: May. 21st, 2012   ·   location: California
id 6519025
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momentintime ( member #16394) posted at 12:30 AM on Friday, October 11th, 2013

Sounds like you new normal is just around the corner. You can do a lot with 600 sq ft. You just have to prioritize. You'll be surprise how much you can do without, and how much simpler your life will be.

Enjoy the city!

BS-me FWS - him
D-day 8/04
R'd

"Global editing disclaimer - I edit almost everything I post, and I am not going to post why every time."...re: Bionical girl

posts: 3163   ·   registered: Sep. 29th, 2007   ·   location: New York
id 6519050
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sullymeishadomi ( member #16305) posted at 1:01 AM on Friday, October 11th, 2013

Time to be my own bff.

posts: 9311   ·   registered: Sep. 22nd, 2007   ·   location: NJ
id 6519090
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Pass ( member #38122) posted at 2:04 AM on Friday, October 11th, 2013

I did the same thing: A small apartment in the city, instead of that big country house.

And holy shit do I love it! I'm within walking distance from my favourite places, and a major bus station that can get me anywhere else in the city. When the kids are here, at bed time we all go to the balcony door and say, "Good night, my city" before closing the curtains.

I should confess that I do the same when they're not here, and sometimes even follow up with, "I love you."

The Princess would never survive in this setting. She thinks this is me trying to make the best of things, but it's really me appreciating the best of things. She once told me that "downtown people" scare her.

And now I am downtown people. Boo!

Divorced the cheater and living my best life now.

The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous.

posts: 3785   ·   registered: Jan. 14th, 2013   ·   location: Ontario, Canada
id 6519168
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newlysingle ( member #38735) posted at 6:14 AM on Friday, October 11th, 2013

I'm a city girl too, so I get it. Enjoy your new place!

BW - Me (40)
XWH -The Gnat
"Engaged" to OW, but the wedding appears to be indefinitely postponed.
M for 8 years, together for 10
1 DD (8), 1 DS (3)
Dday 3/13
Happily Divorced 9/20/13

posts: 1273   ·   registered: Mar. 17th, 2013   ·   location: AZ
id 6519393
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OnAnIsland ( member #34319) posted at 7:01 AM on Friday, October 11th, 2013

I am a city girl trapped in the country- truly the country- neighbors have a donkey. Enjoy your fresh start. I imagine that you have started to downsize. It is amazing what you can do without- including for example your WH. Enjoy this time with your daughter. There will be so much to explore.

[This message edited by OnAnIsland at 1:02 AM, October 11th (Friday)]

D-day: Christmas 2011
D-day 2: 3/28/2013

Married for over 15 years
2 beautiful sons

You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them. Maya Angelou

posts: 1486   ·   registered: Dec. 28th, 2011
id 6519404
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 Spelljean (original poster member #35624) posted at 7:25 AM on Friday, October 11th, 2013

Definitely downsizing. Got rid of half of my clothes and shoes, some furniture, kitchen items.

Been practicing a minimalist lifestyle anyway and this propelled me deep into simplicity!

With less junk around me, I can focus on work, night classes and hopefully paint again. Get into screen printing maybe,

Having a very inexpensive apartment takes away a lot of stress too. I worry less about things like getting laid off, unexpected expenses popping up...

I need some major relaxation, some fun, and a change.

WH: 41
me: BS, 45
Together 18 1/2 years, married 17
DDAY 8/2/12
OW: EA- friend of 4 months
Status: separated

posts: 1037   ·   registered: May. 21st, 2012   ·   location: California
id 6519409
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stronger08 ( member #16953) posted at 8:33 AM on Friday, October 11th, 2013

Where I come from 600 sq. ft. is a decent sized apartment. Trust me, you will have no problem living with you DD in an apartment that size. Congrats on your NB. City life has many benefits that you will come to love. If he offers to buy you out make sure you get market rate. Hire your own appraiser to value the home. Make sure WH is held responsible for CS going forward. I wish you the best of luck.

You cant eat soup with chopsticks.

posts: 6851   ·   registered: Nov. 10th, 2007
id 6519429
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