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Not Even a Baby is Immune

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Ashland13 posted 10/11/2013 07:14 AM

How do you like this one?

As our house gets closer to being put on the market, XPervert (because he's someone else's now) is moving more stuff out. This is finally getting to be okay with me because I don't have to clean any of it or worry it may get broken).

And I'm starting to pack up my stuff and this way I don't care what he does in the place. I'm finally ready to go, though still have bouts of tears. I'm working at not caring anymore and letting the dream die for myself. It's easier that way somehow.


It's not that I'm shocked at this latest statement from X, but am more beginning to enjoy the circus that he's made his life. The things he tells himself and OW are simply unreal and I have to remind myself that he is a "well person" without mental problems...that being said, here is the latest from the vault:

"Well, I haven't been able to do more house things because I've been taking care of the baby and DD." (ETA that he's actually with DD all of two partial days in a whole month anyway). He's been "going to" do these things for over a year's time and the baby has been on the planet for two entire weeks.

It's his changing his project and plans for his time and not planning it that the problem is, always has been, shows up at his job and he gets dinged for it on reviews. There too, blames it on the rain, the monkey in the flowerpot that distracted him, (sarcasm coming out) a blond walking by...anyone's fault but his.

He also continues to tell me that he doesn't discuss me with OW and tribe, yet she had acres of info., my phone number, my pictures and so on...) and access to me electronically last year. His new anxt and anger is that I don't believe him and don't live in lala land with him as she does.

She went into his belongings to get my contact information and I wouldn't dream of such things, yet he believes this is a "better" person than me. I'm not having a meltdown or anything, just writing more of his amazing statements and beliefs that are so different than he used to be. In previous times, he would say that this type of person was awful.

It really forces the realizations to hit home when he can blame a newborn baby or young girl for his own issues and promises he doesn't keep.

[This message edited by Ashland13 at 7:18 AM, October 11th (Friday)]

Pass posted 10/11/2013 08:22 AM

I know that you know this, but god damn, he's an arsehole! Your life may feel like a world of shit right now, but it will eventually be SO much better without him in it!

h0peless posted 10/11/2013 08:27 AM

Does he look like one of these guys?

[This message edited by h0peless at 8:28 AM, October 11th (Friday)]

Ashland13 posted 10/11/2013 09:48 AM

Thanks, you guys.

Millie Vanilli was huge where I grew up, thank you for the laugh, H0peless! Oh, those '80's before they turned out naughty! A cousin and I would do keroke in tween years, lol...

And thank you, Pass. Need to make up reminder cards to tell myself that's the case because some days it's like he forgot his pills.

Can I challenge you to "The Arsehole Song?" I'll do some piano chords if you do some mandolin stringin'...

Change of topic, but how does OW and the Tribe keep falling for this stuff? Even with the lies...the veneer is too cracked...

And how does she think she hooked herself a sugar daddy with so many defaulted bills? What kind of pills is she on? That would be a fun game.

Housefulloflove posted 10/11/2013 21:52 PM

(((Ashland))) I'm sorry you're having to give up your home. I had to step away from ours a few months ago and it was awful but honestly after grieving the loss it was a HUGE weight off my shoulders because it was one less thing that ex could try to hold over my head.

I'm SO late but congrats on the new baby!

Of course an asshole like him will blame the baby and anyone/anything else. If he ran out of people and things to blame I bet he'll start blaming paranormal activity (my ex actually did this when things he misplaced and swore he put in a certain location would turn up in places only he had access to). Nothing can be their fault no matter how much it is obviously their fault. Their brain must be like a never-ending ride on the tilt-a-whirl.

I guess when a person is such an incompetent failure and massive waste of oxygen, deep denial is the only way to keep going.

Housefulloflove posted 10/11/2013 22:09 PM

And how does she think she hooked herself a sugar daddy with so many defaulted bills?

I bet she's being left in the dark for the most part while being fed lies to make his situation seem less dire, temporary and not his fault. She's probably the type that thinks that anything is better than nothing. She's going to have to learn the hard way that there is something MUCH worse than being alone.

With my ex I knew there was something wrong from the beginning but came up with a million and one ways to blame myself for my feelings and eventually was able to talk myself into thinking that I was lucky to have him I made sure to never hold him accountable and that made life bearable. I also believed his BS excuses he had for everything and made it my job to solve any and all of his self-created problems. People like your ex need a certain type of person and OW is probably one of them. By "better" he means she is a more willing victim than you who still believes that he is a normal human-being.

You've come so far from being the type of person your ex could walk all over with no consequences. Maybe OW will stay his doormat for a short while or for the rest of her life, but either way she's going to have a miserable time with a miserable person who isn't capable of loving or respecting her. Guaranteed.

peridot posted 10/11/2013 23:04 PM

It's always someone elses fault. It's never their fault.

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