i have been reading alot on here & it has been very helpful. some of these stories are so similar & i'm hoping i can get some insight from someone who knows where i'm coming from.
on august 9, my wife was at a friends house & i was trying to go to bed early as i had to be up early to leave town for 4 days for work. she usually packs for me because i'm a challenged when it comes to fashion. around midnight i called to see if she would come home soon so i could go to sleep & no answer. i sent a text & no response.
about 30 minutes later i tried calling again & no answer. we had recently upgraded to smart phones & i was a little concerned, so i tried the phone find app & it showed that the phone was located in the country in an area that i had never been to. i had never used this feature before, so i thought it was probably not very accurate.
about 1:30 she calls & said she was leaving her friends house & had left her phone in the car is why she didn't answer. i pulled up the locater again & it showed her location as leaving where it showed before on her way home.
when she got home i asked her where she had been & she said at her friends house, i asked her if she came straight home & she said yes. she showered & came to bed. i didnt sleep much as my imagination was running wild. the next morning on my way out of town i drove to the location she was at the night before to see that it was a hay field & a friend of ours that has been a lifelong friend of hers & one of our "couple friends" was out there bailing hay.
my heart sunk & was having a hard time processing it because i never would have suspected that my wife would not be faithful.
keep in mind that from here on out, the decisions i made were not at 100%. i go on my trip & spend 4 days trying to act like nothing is going on with me. every chance i get im looking to see where my wife is on the phone. the first night i'm away she is back in the hay field, the next 3 everything seems to be back to normal.
the night before i go home, i call a friend & try to tell this story because i have no idea what to do & although i know what this probably means, i don't want to face that. he tells me not to say anything until i can do the investigating that i need to do & know exactly what is going on.
when i get home i look at her phone & see where they have been texting, but the content of the messages had been deleted. i look at the cell phone records & see lots of phone calls. the are sporatic, no calls for a week or so then several in a day. this dude is also married so i figure the calls pick up when she is out of town or when he is bailing hay in the middle of the night.
i checked my calender & the previous time there was alot of phone calls was the last time i had been out of town.
about a week later my wife & i left town together & my wife got drunk & stayed out late & when she came back to the room i was so angry i confronted her & did a really poor job of doing so.
she started telling me how bad a husband i am & i should be ashamed for accusing her of this. she spent the night in her sisters hotel room & the next day she got some things & went to her mothers house to stay.
after about a week i filed for divorce & when she got served she loaded up all her things & moved them into storage. she has continued to deny that there was anything wrong with what she was doing because they were just friends.
she has been texting me like nothing is going on & calling just to chat. she says i have been looking for an excuse to divorce her & am making a big deal out of this so i can finally get rid of her.
i told her i knew that she had gotten together with this guy the time before when i was out of town & she said she had gone by his house just to visit (his family was out of town also)
i dont know what kind of advice im looking for, i'm almost stupid enough to believe her but not quite. although i never would have believed this is happenenig, but now that it has, i think she may have been unfaithful from day 1. am i that stupid?
we have been married for 16 years, we were highschool sweethearts & have no children. i want to beat this m.f. until he has to start wearing diapers.