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Newest Member: YoungNInLove (61865)

User Topic: Zero tolerance for lies.
♀ 25001
Member # 25001
Angry  Posted: 3:46 PM, October 15th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I've never handled it well when I know for a fact that someone is lying to me. That's my downside. I do wish I could handle it much better.

Well, I receive an email from my son's teacher asking if I've reviewed four papers and signed them because he failed them.

One paper she gave him three chances to do, twice on his own and once with her. He received a 0% the two times he did the work and then a 100% when she helped him. Because of the first two zero's he felt it was fair to be graded with a C, so that's what she did.

Needless to say I was floored when I read her email. When he came home I asked him if he received his science test back, he said no. I asked if it was the one about photosynthesis, he said yes (I wanted to double check the subject before I jump to any conclusion.) So he lied to me that he didn't get his test back when in fact he hid the work from me and only gave it to me because I questioned him.

I am pissed. I told him (loudly) that I'm not mad about the grades, I told him we can work on that. I then told him that I was mad at his lying. I said that I make myself available each day to help them with their homework and I've done this since he was four years old. I asked him how I can help him if I don't see/know that he's failing in his school work.

He understood what I was saying. I'm just so mad at the lying. I told him that it makes it look like I don't care about him or his school work when the teacher has to come to me to find out where the work I'm supposed to sign is. Ugh...

He tells me about all his good grades, but hides his bad grades and those are the papers I NEED to see so I can help him.

I'm just so frustrated.

Me - BS, 40 (I'm not old...I'm vintage)
Two Wonderful children - DS11, DD8
Getting my ducks in a row for divorce... finally (4+ D-Days too many - listed in profile.)

Posts: 6121 | Registered: Jul 2009 | From: In the darkest depths of hell!
♀ 31349
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 6:21 PM, October 15th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


That's rough. Clearly he wants to avoid having a conversation about his bad marks because he is scared of the response. I know how even keel and compassionate you are with your kids, but I think that sometimes they just get worked up either way.

Hopefully you can remind him that he is safe with you, and that you just want to help him. Obviously V is not his age so I don't have any personal experience with this... but I bet he can come around. He's a good kid.

[This message edited by Jrazz at 6:21 PM, October 15th (Tuesday)]

"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." - Deeply Scared's mom

Posts: 29076 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
Topic Posts: 2

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