"I" had an EA before we got married!!!! I always thought since I wasn't physically "with" OM, I didn't cheat. But, I did. Emotionally. I hid my friendship with a high school friend from my now husband, then boyfriend. I NEVER put 2 and 2 together!!
Last night, I was thinking about all my H's OW and how I measure up, my shattered self esteem, my broken heart, my sadness, pure sadness and defeat. I was also thinking how I never want any of this to happen again. Ever. With my H cheating. I want him to fix what is broken.
Then, I started digging. "I" had feelings for someone else for years and years. And, to an extent, I still do and will always harbor secret feelings for my HS friend. A person I NEVER see or talk to. It's so bazzar.
I feel like such an asshole and relized I was a little broken, too.
Gonna see my IC first thing Monday.
This is deep stuff.