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Newest Member: DevotedDad (50542)

User Topic: Will this always be between us
♀ 35803
Member # 35803
Default  Posted: 9:15 PM, October 18th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Just wondering if this is a normal feeling for all of you in R. Do you feel that there is always going to be something (the affair) always between you. I am not sure that I can grasp the concept of this not being something that will forever be between us. We are a year in and I am wondering if this thing is always going to be a "thing" that will separate us in some way. I am working on forgiveness and I know that I am not totally there.

BS- 36
married 12 years together 18
DD- 5/27/12
He walked out on me and the girls 5/26/12
Recovery started 9/15/12

Hoping for Serenity, Courage, and Wisdom!!!!

Posts: 130 | Registered: Jun 2012 | From: New York
♂ 32232
Member # 32232
Default  Posted: 9:48 PM, October 18th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

3 years out and it is still there for me. I have forgiven and ok in that regard. It doesn't occupy my entire waking hours as it did in the early days, and I don't often specifically think of it, but it is there.

Posts: 732 | Registered: May 2011
♀ 31349
Member # 31349
Default  Posted: 10:14 PM, October 18th (Friday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

I'm not sure that it ever goes away, but it transitions from a gaping wound to a scar, and scars become a part of us. They're subtle reminders of where we've been, but they don't affect our day-to-day as much as the years pass.

"And above all things, never think that you're not good enough yourself. A man should never think that. My belief is that in life people will take you at your own reckoning."
- I. Asimov

Posts: 25492 | Registered: Feb 2011 | From: California
Topic Posts: 3

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