"We're not broken, just bent. We can learn to love again."
Now it is a dull ache, an ever present piece of my mind- but now instead of being a giant mess of scattered soul and feelings in my head, it is now more organized, filed in a manner that I can access bits of it as I need to. And I do need to- its just that now I have a little better control over it.
i can just look at the box as a whole, or open it up and just take certain pieces out.
I am so sorry you are feeling this way- it is just awful- but you will be strong and the pain will get better. I promise.
Hugs and strength to you.
I thought I had stopped pretending. I was wrong.
Me- BS 41
Him- WS 38 and STBX
2 DS- 15 and 16
DDay 1- 07-24-2013
DDay 2: EA w/CoW, 06-15-2017
Marathonwaseasy, the soul-rending agony sometimes feels like you simply can't stand one more second of it, but I promise you that that will fade. Hang in there.
[This message edited by lostworld at 3:19 PM, October 19th (Saturday)]
discovered 4 month long EA
R - slow and steady but very optimistic
The most physically painful thing I've experienced is an infected root canal. I can remember that 2 shots of novocaine did nothing to reduce the hurt. I remember a whole lot about the experience, and I remember I was in excruciating pain, but I don't remember the actual pain itself....
[This message edited by sisoon at 6:36 PM, October 19th (Saturday)]
I remember it felt like I'd NEVER get to a point where it wasn't agony...it's gradual. I do remember clearly thinking, "wow, I haven't sobbed today!" when I hit that milestone.
Now I recollect those horrible days with a bit of a detachment. Like I remember the where and when, but my memory is almost like that of an observer.
It's part of the mourning process; think of grieving for someone close to you....
Hang in there; you'll get through this. (((Marathonwaseasy)))
[This message edited by sad12008 at 8:34 PM, October 19th (Saturday)]