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Newest Member: ConfidentJayne (61852)

User Topic: Feelings of revenge today...
♀ 41047
Member # 41047
Default  Posted: 10:51 AM, October 20th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Long story short, my hubby's "indiscretions" are internet based, porn addict, "hook up sites", etc. He's been sharing naked selfies online (still need to gather intel as to where he shared it, just caught a glimpse of the photo and site in passing).

Hubby is really quite insecure... he's the type who is ALWAYS snooping on me. ALWAYS. Ironic since I have never pulled a fraction of the crap he has... actually, that's because I've NEVER pulled that crap.

My head today is saying "hey, go post half naked photos of yourself on a few of those sites... and let him find them in his snooping... see how HE feels when the tables are turned!!"

But alas, I won't. Not that I would care if my boobs were online (obviously I wouldn't include my face! Haha!), but because I know that's not the solution. AND because I know he wouldn't get it at all. He wouldn't see it as me doing to him what he is doing to me. It wouldn't be the same... I would be the "bad guy" and he would be the "victim". (He's an amazing victim. ANY discussion with the tiniest bit of criticism turns him into an epic victim.)

Me: 36 BW
Him: 35 WH
Together: almost 13 years
Married: almost 9 years
4 kids, one grandson
DD #1: Fall 2008 (EA, plans to meet up with OW found)
DD #2: October 2013 (excessive porn, "hook up sites", naked photos of him... just like 2008)

Posts: 5 | Registered: Oct 2013
♀ 40633
Member # 40633
Default  Posted: 6:52 PM, October 20th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Well, my WH isn't very victim-y (thank goodness, I couldn't handle that, you must be a saint), but I've had the same thought.

I can't make him feel the pain that I'm feeling, and that he'll never experience this after everything he's done is not fair. When I'm feeling revenge-y, sometimes I fantasize that I'll spend the next year pretending to R, but instead screwing my way around town, then tell him all about it in a nice card on Christmas Day. Or maybe I'll put together a little picture book of every guy I screwed, complete with graphic descriptions of each encounter, and how much I liked it. Divorce papers will be tucked in an envelope on the last page.

Awful, huh? Of course, I know very well that causing a bigger mess is not a solution, and I'd never do it because a) That's just shitty and b) it's not an experience I'd wish on my worst enemy, let alone someone I love.

Guess all I'm saying is that I get you.

[This message edited by Thessalian at 6:53 PM, October 20th (Sunday)]

Me: BW, 30
Him: WH, 36

7 years of double-digit ONS, LTA, hookers - the works.

First found out: August 20, 2013
Whole truth: January 1, 2014

Posts: 168 | Registered: Sep 2013
♀ 40787
Member # 40787
Default  Posted: 9:18 PM, October 20th (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Revenge fantasies have helped me so far but as with you they stay fantasies. The things I've thought of are scary but understandable. Sorry hun. :(

Now if there was a way for the OW to inexplicably wake up bald one morning...

Me: 39
WH: 42
DDay:Sep 19 2013 (only TT of EA)
Oct 4th 2013 revealed PA through snooping.
Marred 16 years, together for 20. Looking to R at this time. We have awesome kids (12/14).

Posts: 273 | Registered: Sep 2013
Topic Posts: 3

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