You've processed a lot. You understand it better. You're not "missing" him at this point. You're in either the denial phase (numb) or acceptance phase of your mourning of your loss. I doubt you're in denial, but I mention it only because, well, I guess it's possible. I'm two years out and think I'm in Acceptance, but sometimes I'll have a fleeting thought of surprise......like when is driving or something random......and think, "I just can't believe this really happened.", which sounds and feels an awful lot like denial.
I do understand the "not feeling". I see my XWW weekly (kid exchanges) and honestly, I don't "feel" pain or love or anything when I'm around her. I don't experience anything on the anniversary of DDay or the day the D was final. ...just another day.....with one exception.....my DDay is December 25!
Dmari, you have worked hard. You've spent 1000's of hours on SI, for starters. I know from personal experience now healing that can be.
My thought for you is that your "not feeling", in this case, is a healthy sign. You are healing. And, just like you allowed yourself to feel the pain, also embrace this feeling of healing.
Best to you.
[This message edited by nomistakeaboutit at 4:46 AM, October 22nd (Tuesday)]