First, let me say that my jaw dropped when I read the first sentence of your post. I am so, so sorry.
im finding the situation intolerable!
That is completely understandable. The whole situation is awful. Do you have someone close to you that can help you and/or advocate for you?
I'm so concerned for your physical health and well-being.
2 kids: DD16 and DS19
Him: The Assclown NPD
OW: "friend" of 15 years
Divorced! Feb. 2010
Everybody, soon or late, sits down to a banquet of consequences.
~Robert Louis Stevenson