I sent her a message over facebook, and tried to keep it chill. I really didn't want to have any contact with her, but my gut said there was more than he was telling me. She was incredibly rude, had no shame, and bragged about having sex with him in both of our vehicles?!?
I have no idea what is going to happen with my marriage, but if I could erase that brief conversation from my memory, I certainly would. I suppose I already knew a woman that would knowingly fool around with a married man, in a car no less, has no class, but she absolutely confirmed it for me.
I would rise above it although I must admit I have the same dreams as well! She is trying desparately to get a reaction out of you & upset you.
Personally I would ignore her pathetic attempts to get a rise out of you & maintain your pride, strength & dignity
No, she cares about herself.
Don't give her the satisfaction of letting her know she gets to you.
Slowly she will fade into the backgroud and be the nothing she already is.
Hold your head high, and your standards higer.
It hurts right now, but in the long run she will be the one hurting while you are the woman healing.
It’s not unusual for the dumped OW to behave in this way. They are trying to prove that the WH is being noble by staying with his family and he is making the wrong decision. She wants to show that what they had was true love and a “relationship”. They are trying to deal with the rejection by focussing on the person they perceive prevented them being together – the BW. And she wants to hurt the BW because she knows that will hurt the WH far more than targeting him directly. She usually tries that first anyway. The pleading, begging, then the anger and then finally hitting out at what the WH truly values.
It’s sad and pathetic. The best thing to do is burn it all. Draw pictures of her on it, scrawl hateful things across it, rip it, shred it, burn it. Use it for toilet paper. Or muddy shoes. And ignore her. Having been the centre of attention (so they thought), the thing they hate most is indifference and being ignored.
She won't spill her guts - she will lie to get you to think what she wants you to think. This is a woman that had a relationship with a married man. Let's not pretend she has any morals or ethics. She doesn't. She is selfish and has no problem being dishonest or helping others be dishonest.
If she feels bad for you, she will withhold the hardest information. If she wants your H, she will tell you they still talk. If she wants your H to suffer, she will embellish the relationship to make him seem much worse, and much more interested in her than reality would show.
No, you won't get a damned thing from a lying OW except a headache, and of course the fun knowledge that you gave her another ego boost by showing her that you still think about her, and that her intrusion into your life is still on your mind.
OW do not care if the attention is positive or negative. They want attention. Don't give her any.
OW lie. They offer nothing of value.
She showed up at your door GLOATING, shoving a box of crap in your face and rubbing your nose in the fact that she STAINED every single part of your lie.
I completely get it.
I would assume this loser has no boyfriend/live in/husband to whom you can return the favor? I'll assume not as I didn't see mention of one.
I'd send the box back to her, alright. With everything still in it, just as she gave it to me. Except, I'd make sure to top it off with dogshit and plenty of it.
No note needed.
Trust me on this.
Ow in the case of the XPervert, for instance, cared only that she "won" and to tell me what a horrible person I was and we had.
What I've known of OW's is that it's a contest for them when they feel feelings for our WH's and often times, there's nothing to be done and the only care is that they "win" the prize.
Maybe there are some OW who are different or realize later what they did but I haven't found this too often.
I don't mean to generalize but to speak from a few other instances I know of locally and the experience that XPervert gave us.
The one interaction I ever had, she initiated and only ended in pain for me, FWIW.
You gave me nothing and now it's all I've got - Bono
A person is a person, no matter how small. -Dr. Suess
Perserverance and spirit have done wonders in all ages.
This douche of a woman already put a knife in your back. Don't go near her.
Sounds like a bunny boiler. Of course, depending on your situation, and if your WH is not stepping up, her work, family, husband if she's got one, grown kids, garbage man, should all be made aware. It's only fair.
Just don't go near her!!
Always, tell the other BS! Always!
"It's hard to be in love when you can't tell lies"!
[This message edited by LMomof2 at 3:06 PM, October 24th (Thursday)]
[This message edited by devasted30 at 11:07 AM, October 25th (Friday)]