SurvivingInfidelity.com Forum Archives

sisoon posted 10/24/2013 17:55 PM

I've been wearing hearing aids for 38.5 months. They have a 3 year warranty, and I need to either rebuild these ($270) or buy new ones ($1900 at Costco, $6000 other places). 2.5 months out of warranty....

It turns out many, many HAs of all brands need to be rebuilt periodically, so I decided to rebuild my old ones - takes a week, though. Can't hear much of anything now.
****************************

Replacement value of my hi-fi system is well into the luxury car range. It's marvelous. Ten years ago, 90% of the records I played and broadcasts I listened were really moving, emotionally speaking. I just don't listen to it any more.

I dropped my Chicago Symphony subscription.

I think I just can't hear well enough to enjoy the music any more.
************************

It's not a total loss. I may have lost my ability to enjoy music from a distance (couldn't afford to sit in the best seats at the orchestra - picked my hifi system up for pennies on the dollar), but we go to concerts in small venues with soloists or small ensembles. We sit close enough for me to get the music.

And we've taken up ballroom dancing.

As I say, not a total loss, but come to think of it, the partial loss hurts. I love orchestral music, especially the big, heavy romantic pieces along with Beethoven. I've got so many memories of unexpected musical delight provided by the Metropolitan Opera (once), Chicago, St. Louis, National Symphony, and Cleveland Orchestras. I'm really sad that I won't have any new memories.

Ah, well. I'm glad it's just bad hearing that stands between me and new memories....

[This message edited by sisoon at 5:58 PM, October 24th (Thursday)]

authenticnow posted 10/24/2013 18:44 PM

sisoon,

My dad has degenerative hearing loss and I have very strong memories of how it affected him throughout my childhood.

He hardly hears at all now, even with two hearing aids. It's very tough for him.

I'm sorry you're struggling. I hope that your rebuilt hearing aids bring you the results that you desire.

AN

jo2love posted 10/24/2013 20:42 PM

(((sisoon)))

Crushed1 posted 10/25/2013 00:01 AM

(((sisoon))) I hope you get your HA's back soon so you can start enjoying your music and making new memories.

LosferWords posted 10/25/2013 01:20 AM

(((sisoon)))

I'm really sorry you are dealing with this. I've been a huge lover of music since the day I was born. I'm very passionate about it. One thing I haven't talked about is the fact that my antidepressant medication took away a lot of my passion for music. The music is still in my head, though. All of the songs that ever influenced me, or that I have ever played, or that I have written, all of the feelings involved, are still in my head.

Your brain is the biggest receptacle for all of this music. I hope you can cling to that, while you are waiting for your hearing aids to be fixed.

In the meantime, I am sending you many well wishes.

And what's up with the ballroom dancing? That's awesome! That's one talent I will never have. I have two left feet, and they are both size 13. Very awkward.

Take care, sisoon.

tushnurse posted 10/25/2013 07:16 AM

hearing loss sucks plain and simple.

I get where you are coming from on not getting out of the music what you used to. Have you looked into a super good set of headphones? I already have a fair amount of loss, not ready for the HA's yet, but they are in my future. But some really good headphones can make a big difference when you are listening to Orchestral music. It really helps to pull those higher tones that we tend to loose first through.

The cost of HA's is ridiculous, and my Dad has also found Costco to be by far the cheapest place to get them. Which is good since he tends to loose them, jump in the ocean with them, leave them set on the lenai and get rained on....You get the picture.

Anyway, I hope you get yours back soon.

sisoon posted 10/25/2013 14:29 PM

Boy, tush, great minds think alike. sometimes I'm a little slow,, though. As so often happens, posting helped me think more clearly, and I thought of headphones as I woke up. My fancy hifi needs a special adapter for headphones, but I think my son has an extra.

Losing any facility is tough. Being without the use of any sense is tough. I know the impact on my life of moderate hearing loss. I can't imagine how tough it is for the many, many people whose loss is much worse than mine.

I think the message to myself in this post is that it's really important to stay in touch with feelings and where the feelings come from.

I've been feeling sad and angry a lot recently, and finding the reasons really helps. Some of that is due to hearing loss. Knowing the source allows me to handle the emotion without taking it out on people around me. That's a nice win.

losfer, Sorry about the effect of ADs. I hope the effect is temporary.

'Smooth' is not and never has been how I'd describe my movements. I have a hard time finding a beat, and a harder time staying with it - and my W is wedded to the beat. All of our lives together, she's complained about musicians missing the beat. I imagine she's right, but I can't hear it. I definitely have left and right feet, but sometimes I confuse which is which.

All the same, dancing together is amazing fun. The lousier you are at the beginning, the more fun it is likely to be - after all, going from nothing to a basic step gives you a sense of great accomplishment.

So I encourage you to learn. It's possible you're one of the 20 uninjured people alive who can't dance, but very unlikely, especially since you like music. There are usually cheap classes given at high schools, community colleges, city/town/village rec centers - take one. You owe it to yourselves.

Come to think of it, moving to the music - like in a dance class - could reconnect you music. I don't mean to argue, but facts is facts....

[This message edited by sisoon at 2:29 PM, October 25th (Friday)]

LosferWords posted 10/25/2013 15:01 PM

I'll keep that advice in mind, sisoon. I once tried to two-step, and it was a disaster. I think I will have to stick with the mosh pits. That is a groove I can get into.

My wife has hinted at us taking salsa lessons. That scares me! Maybe I will take the plunge one day. I figure it's her toes that are at risk, so why not?

I appreciate your humor.

What do you plan on listening to when you get your adapter for your headphones?

little turtle posted 10/25/2013 22:04 PM

Why do you need to rebuild your hearing aids? I've been wearing hearing aids since I was 5 and I've never heard of this, so I'm curious!

I understand what you're saying about not hearing the beats in music. I can hear the bass, but none of the high pitched sounds. I can't hear any whispering or birds... as well as most door bells, timers, and ring/text sounds! As far as the dancing goes, do you count your music? That's what I did back in my dancing days.

Thanks for the reminder that we need to look into ourselves and see how we feel about things in our lives from time to time.

Jrazz posted 10/25/2013 22:22 PM

(((sisoon)))

Your mind is razor sharp - I know it's not the same but I bet you can re-visit some of your favorite symphonies in your noggin when you want.

I'm glad you and Mrs.Sisoon are enjoying dancing together.

FaithFool posted 10/25/2013 23:07 PM

I'm one ear down with tinnitus and treasuring the one that's left. I used to play music, have three guitars and will pick it up again soon.

My favourite live music is bluegrass, five musicians around one microphone in an old church lined with hardwood. Glorious.

I do go to the occasional rock show but always bring earplugs.

Chet Atkins got so discouraged from hearing loss that he finally gave up playing. It broke his heart in the end.

It's hard. I hear ya.

((((Sisoon))))

ETA I was just shopping for headphones today. My old ones were 20 years old when I sat on them and broke them. New ones are pricey, but they sound really good, even on an mp3 on ITunes. I was amazed at the quality. On a real hi fi they would be spectacular.

[This message edited by FaithFool at 11:16 PM, October 25th (Friday)]

sisoon posted 10/26/2013 13:06 PM

Those lessons work, Losfer. Two step seems boring to me - learning some more patterns really boosts the fun factor. Just sayin'....

I can hear snatches of music in my head. I can't carry a tune, though, so I can't hear it for long. Bummer.

Bluegrass, you bet, FaithFool! No BG clubs around here, but a guy brings various artists in every month. It's always terrific. I get there early, so I can sit within 10-15 feet of the lead singer....

I'm not rushing to get headphones. No matter what, live music is better. I posted feeling sorry for myself - forgetting that the Northwestern U orchestra is performing tonight. We're going, and we can sit very close to the musicians. It's not the CSO, but there's so much musical talent around that even amateurs around here make very satisfying music.

LT, These are Siemens/Rexton digital HAs. Receiver in the ear, electronics behind the ear. Mine were rebuilt under warranty 15 months ago. On a big HA forum, a lot of people say they rebuild their HAs every 1-3 years, so I figured it was normal. This year mine just weren't amplifying anymore. Last year it sounded like the mics and the amplifiers stopped working. I was using them at the g2g, and they weren't working right then.

Cally60 posted 10/27/2013 02:31 AM

Have you tried the loop systems they have in lots of theaters? Do they not help when it comes to music? (I'm interested, because my own hearing seems to be deteriorating fairly rapidly.)