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Wh being lovelier

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hobbeskat posted 10/25/2013 17:58 PM

8 months past D-Day. My Wh is actually getting better with time. He now texts/tells me he's sorry without prompting (yesterday he texted me saying he burst into tears listening to a wedding song and said he was so sorry, he treasured me etc), he's generally being extremely lovely and extremely understanding and supportive. I had a bit of a freak out last week. I check his activity log on FB to see who he's looking at. I saw a girl's name I didn't recognise and immediately contacted him and asked who she was. And I felt like a nutcase for doing it. He explained (he is part of a housing action group, she was sacking off a meeting to go to something, "better" so he looked at her FB to see if the event was listed on her profile- all this was in a round robin email of about 10 people) and reassured me and also said he completely understood and he was really happy I came to him about it.

He does have off days, I am increasingly forgiving of these. He's human and can be in a shitty mood. Sometimes he has gotten defensive/angry but immediately corrects himself and apologises and says it's because he's angry at himself, not me, and doesn't mean to snap at me. When his family said some horrible stuff about our marriage, I went into a spiral hating myself for telling them about his A. He reassured me that I did what I needed to do to get support and perspective and it's his fault I was in that situation.

In short- he continues to surprise me. He says the A was a horrendous one-off and he has been working on himself. He's become more open with me, too, and we talk a lot more. I thought by now he'd have slacked up a bit, but he's actually getting better.

We've had some difficult times lately (OW contacted me, his family being arseholes) but I still feel okay and they didn't shake me too much. I had a good rant here and a good rant with him and feel alright. Which is relieving.

Just thought I'd share something positive :) One of the reasons I love SI is that you can see by peoples' sigs that they've had D-Days, they've felt the rare pain, and they've survived. I find that comforting.

[This message edited by hobbeskat at 6:02 PM, October 25th (Friday)]

brkn_heartd posted 10/25/2013 19:44 PM

I am happy for you that things are getting better. R certainly has it's ups and downs, but I believe worth it if both parties work for it.

I am glad to hear you are doing well, feeling good and have positives to share!!

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