Revenge affairs never really work in the end you will feel worse than your H.
Take time and work with your IC before you make any serious decisions.
I had a friend whose wife had a girls weekend in Vegas. She had a ONS with a stranger. Got an STD. She also felt super guilty and started acting out.
He finally sat her down and asked what is wrong her. No response at all.
A few days later she showed up at his office and told him everything.
He was very upset and could not believe his wife could act like this. Even her GF's did not know she had a ONS.
Their marriage was on the brink of failure.
His wife offered him a free pass. She did not want yo know about it.
A few weekends go by and one Saturday morning my buddy is whistling Dixie making breakfast. His wife us wondering why the hell is he so happy.
Then it dawns on her. He used the free pass.
She asked him and with a big grin back he said "You bet ya!"
She was devastated thinking he would never use the free pass.
Then he tells her he did it with one of her GF's from Vegas.
He said now we are even. It hurts you so now you know how it feels.
He warned her the next time she chests she will never see him ever again.
I know him. He means it.
Do not lower yourself to his standards.
Revenge always has a way of biting you back.