You need to tell him how disappointed you are. That he had a second chance to make things better and failed.
I was proposed to in a bank parking lot the first time around. Was given the ring after he got it from his mom. It was her old set. Not really romantic to just be handed a ring. A ring should be placed on your finger with words of love, commitment and fidelity. I suppose that is where our men went wrong. We just got handed the rings and didn't get the words or emotions behind the act of being proposed to or the significance of the ring.
I know he will take it as you being ungrateful, however he needs to realize how majorly he messed up with his A and his behavior. Then he needs to know that everything that he does right will help with R. That when he just halfasses it that it damages R. You are worth the effort. He needs to show you that. By just handing it to you and saying the linked part is not showing you that he feels you are worth the effort. Who in their right mind wants to stay with someone and go through the pain of R if they are not shown how loved, valued and treasured they are? That they are worth the effort to do the romantic things they need and deserve.
I have actually told my WH that if he isn't helping in my healing and recovery than why should I stay? I mean if I am to do the work alone, I will be alone and not have to put up with him and his behavior.