The week after I moved out, he (let's just call him Fuckhead) showed up on her doorstep with a couple remote control helicopters for my boys. By the way, this guy has a wife, and two college-age daughters, and there have been rumours in the neighbourhood about him screwing around on his wife and pursuing other women.
A few days ago, Fuckhead asked The Princess if he could take my boys with him to the "Halloween store". The fucking idiot said yes!
Her justification: He wouldn't do anything with both boys there.
He gets them in the car, and starts pumping them for info: "Is your mom dating anyone?"; "Really, I wouldn't have thought a pretty woman like her would date him."; "How's your dad handling this?"; "He has depression? Want to know what I think of that? That's something that happens when you watch too many soap operas"; "See that strip joint? That's where we'll go next time."
The boys told me this today, and told me that they both thought he was an arsehole for making fun of my depression. Then 10 said, "And he's been texting me."
If I hadn't already been pissed off, that would have sealed the deal. I had a look at the texting app on 10's iPod, and the texts were pretty harmless-looking - just about when they were going to work on his yard next - but I still didn't like it. And most importantly, The Princess didn't tell me about any of this!
I had a talk with both boys, saying that if they ever get a text they are uncomfortable with - from anyone - they were to show it to me or their mom.
Phoned The Princess after she got the boys back to her place tonight, and discussed my worries. I told her that she needed to back me up on this, and we would tell 10 that there will be no more texting with Fuckhead. At first she asked if I couldn't just check his texts every time I have the boys. I told her that was not enough.
Finally she called 10 into the room, told him she was on the phone with me, and we don't want him texting Fuckhead anymore. 10 said okay, and that he would delete Fuckhead's contact info, as well as blocking him.
I asked her if she would just do a casual neighbourly chat with Fuckhead, and mention that "by the way", we don't let our kids text with adults. That would keep it casual and non-confrontational. She was unwilling to do that, and wanted me to. So then it becomes an angry, accusatory message from the jilted husband. Yeah, that'll make it better.
However, I AM willing to do something uncomfortable to protect my kids, so I sent him the following email:
Hey Fuckhead, 10 was telling me that he has been texting you. I just wanted to let you know that we don't let our kids text with adults - for everybody's protection. He has removed your contact info from his iPod. Thanks, Pass
10 was telling me that he has been texting you. I just wanted to let you know that we don't let our kids text with adults - for everybody's protection. He has removed your contact info from his iPod.
Thanks, Pass
The Princess called me back later to thank me for sending the email, and tell me she had a further talk with both boys. She told him that while we don't think Fuckhead is a molester, they will quite often elbow their way into a family when the dad has left, buy things for the kids, and spend extra time with them, and try to belittle their parents - so we're not taking any chances, and we're shutting this down.
Fucking finally, she took SOME action. Yet another GREAT side effect of her fucking everything that moves, I'm out of the picture in our neighbourhood, and we have to worry about predators.
Personally, I don't care anymore if she wants to spread her legs for everyone, but she needs to protect my kids!
I can't remember if I've mentioned to y'all how much I fucking hate her.
[This message edited by pass at 10:05 PM, October 27th (Sunday)]
Married Aug/95 DDay Nov/12 Separated Mar/13 Finally divorced Jul/17
The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous!
Don't make anyone a priority when you are only an option.
How was I ever so in love with this idiotic fucking woman?
How the fuck dare he....
Do you converse with his wife? I'd be filling her in on this.
Thank god your kids have you, papa bear!!!
Thanks, tesla. I'm doing what I can.
[This message edited by pass at 11:19 PM, October 27th (Sunday)]
And yes, why do we have such stupid, stupid former spouses who have to be told that this is inappropriate? Why do we have to continue to do double duty?
I'm glad your kids have a strong and watchful papa bear.
I'm sorry for your anger, Pass, it's awful to have. It's the strangest kind of energy there is, IYAM (If you ask me) and not easy to get rid of.
And I notice with depression, (do any of you?) that I have badly, people tend to latch on and give another person that for their identity for a long time to come...like a label almost, or a thing to know about them.
I'm glad you stood up to Princess Arse-olella and told how you felt. It's not easy.
As expected, the XPervert has done this in a little bit different way with DD and then tells me "You are not being peaceful." One time a memo from his L came that "ExW needs to cooperate"...i.e., doormat.
I asked XPervert to keep a distance from our friends/neighbors, primarily single ladies to boot, but don't think he will. He can't get info on me if he stays away, right? It doesn't feel right, as you were thinking of Halloween Neighbor Man. I guess kind of like your swearing habit, I have a habit of naming everyone.
It's a little different from your issue, relative to neighbors...he did tell me he found one attractive (Bittersweet Boy's Mom, who can't stand him, lol) and she and I think it was a "dig".
I hope this will go by soon.
A person is a person, no matter how small. -Dr. Suess
Perserverance and spirit have done wonders in all ages.
-George Washington
