Cookies are required for login or registration. Please read and agree to our cookie policy to continue.

Newest Member: SnowyOwl

Divorce/Separation :
Just went to our last dinner as a family.

This Topic is Archived
default

 careerlady (original poster member #16958) posted at 4:31 AM on Monday, October 28th, 2013

I am pretty sure there is another A. Just need a few more details. We've had a horrible round and I never got true remorse and he has reneged on counseling again anyway and the verbal abuse persists, so this is it. I found out about the new OW this weekend during a family trip to the in laws. Next week I resurrect my filed divorce and finally have him served. He has no idea. During the walk in the boardwalk and the dinner I had times when I thought this family is worth anything, but I can't put up with both serial cheating and his ill treatment of me, however badly I wanted a complete family for our 15 month old. This has hot to be it, though it breaks my heart.

Tomorrow I gotta call OW and the court. Tonight I just want to cry.

Me (BS, 35); The Snake (WS, 36) 13yrs together; 1 baby boy (DOB 7/12)
Serial cheater-Multiple OWs, Multiple D-Days
D by default 5/3/14!
In house 8 mos, moved out 7/1!!!
Summary: http://youtu.be/iaysTVcounI

posts: 949   ·   registered: Nov. 10th, 2007   ·   location: Northern California
id 6539669
default

Pass ( member #38122) posted at 4:34 AM on Monday, October 28th, 2013

I'm sorry you're going through this.

Divorced the cheater and living my best life now.

The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous.

posts: 3785   ·   registered: Jan. 14th, 2013   ·   location: Ontario, Canada
id 6539670
default

Lyonesse ( member #32943) posted at 4:42 AM on Monday, October 28th, 2013

Hugs, CL. You are right, you cannot continue with the disrespect to you, but I know that doesn't make it any easier.

Me: BS, 40's.

posts: 1956   ·   registered: Jul. 29th, 2011   ·   location: West Coast
id 6539684
default

rainagain ( member #14917) posted at 4:48 AM on Monday, October 28th, 2013

I'm sorry cl, you and your baby deserve more. It sounds like you are setting out to provide that for you both now. Strength.

Now, faith is being sure of what you hope for and certain of what you cannot see. Heb 11:11 done been through the pain and the sorrow the struggle is nothing but love- Marino Me: Divorced

posts: 1300   ·   registered: Jun. 8th, 2007   ·   location: Massachusetts
id 6539687
default

vivere ( member #34465) posted at 4:59 AM on Monday, October 28th, 2013

((CL))

I can't put up with both serial cheating and his ill treatment of me

..and neither should you!

Abuse in any form is unacceptable. Sometimes they force our hands

You are responsible for your own happiness :)

posts: 316   ·   registered: Jan. 8th, 2012
id 6539696
default

forlornheart ( member #40726) posted at 5:51 AM on Monday, October 28th, 2013

It's actually a better time to get the divorce over as she's still very young. I know she will recognize his not around but she's just too young to grasp what's happenings. Can you image if you waited another 10 years or even 5? My stbx was a serial cheater as well, I stayed far too long. I just didn't respect myself enough or fear or maybe a combo of both.

Good for you sticking up for yourself.

I know it hurts, even with all I know I'm still hurt. I love the man I thought he was....but it was all a persona.

Get some counseling it will help.

Hugs!

Deb

Me: 48- BW
Him: 45-WH-chronic cheater, PA and EA
Current Her: Mid to late 30's fatassed, no necked, troglodyte
D Day: August 23, 2013
Separated: August 23, 2013

posts: 52   ·   registered: Sep. 20th, 2013   ·   location: Michigan
id 6539737
default

thenon-goddess ( member #31229) posted at 1:33 PM on Monday, October 28th, 2013

I'm so sorry.

FWIW, I would call the court and not the OW. She'll just tip your husband off and fill you full of lies. Don't even give her the satisfaction.

(((CL)))

Divorced! 4/1/16

posts: 1509   ·   registered: Feb. 18th, 2011
id 6539899
default

msk99 ( member #29293) posted at 4:16 PM on Monday, October 28th, 2013

So sorry to hear about this, I totally get the internal battle of doing whatever you can to maintain your family versus dealing with a serial cheater. You are not alone in this battle, heartbreaking for sure.

Stay strong!

BS (Me): 40 STBXWW (Her): 40
M: 15 Years, 2 Awesome Boys
Divorced

Five simple rules of happiness:
1. Free your heart from hatred.
2. Free your mind from worries.
3. Live simply.
4. Give more.
5. Expect less.

posts: 712   ·   registered: Aug. 11th, 2010   ·   location: Alberta
id 6540080
default

nowiknow23 ( member #33226) posted at 4:25 PM on Monday, October 28th, 2013

((((careerlady)))) Sending you strength, honey.

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

posts: 40250   ·   registered: Aug. 29th, 2011
id 6540093
default

sunsetslost ( member #39885) posted at 4:49 PM on Monday, October 28th, 2013

(((cl)))

Strength to you.

Divorced 7/11/14. New Beginning on the Gulf of Mexico. It's real nice.

posts: 800   ·   registered: Jul. 20th, 2013   ·   location: The beach.
id 6540130
default

 careerlady (original poster member #16958) posted at 5:03 PM on Monday, October 28th, 2013

Thanks all.

Thenongoddess from the texts and one voicemail I've found she doesn't seem to know he's married. I could be wrong which is why I'm trying to capture more texts but if she's innocent she can be the final nail in the coffin. The previous OW was also unaware and we had a good (if painful) conversation

Me (BS, 35); The Snake (WS, 36) 13yrs together; 1 baby boy (DOB 7/12)
Serial cheater-Multiple OWs, Multiple D-Days
D by default 5/3/14!
In house 8 mos, moved out 7/1!!!
Summary: http://youtu.be/iaysTVcounI

posts: 949   ·   registered: Nov. 10th, 2007   ·   location: Northern California
id 6540145
This Topic is Archived
Cookies on SurvivingInfidelity.com®

SurvivingInfidelity.com® uses cookies to enhance your visit to our website. This is a requirement for participants to login, post and use other features. Visitors may opt out, but the website will be less functional for you.

v.1.001.20250404a 2002-2025 SurvivingInfidelity.com® All Rights Reserved. • Privacy Policy