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Another Online Profile Gem

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EvenKeel posted 10/29/2013 09:19 AM

Seen this last night - isn't he just something:

What are you looking for:Someone who will return every favor I do for her. Someone who is always fresh or does not mind washing up for satisfying my desires.

Isn't he just a nice bowl of "all about me-me-me"???

It went on and on about how he expected you to be all about him.

[This message edited by EvenKeel at 9:20 AM, October 29th (Tuesday)]

nutmegkitty posted 10/29/2013 09:40 AM

Always fresh? Isn't that some feminine wash slogan?

jemimapd posted 10/29/2013 09:44 AM

Send him a pic of a Roomba

Nature_Girl posted 10/29/2013 10:49 AM

Oh. My. Word.

EvenKeel posted 10/29/2013 12:03 PM

Do you ever read profiles and think "this is a joke, right?"

The entire thing was like that.

Once again, I am thankful for people's honesty.

I took a break from OLD and just reactivated my account last night to look around. Might be deactivating soon!

Snapdragon posted 10/29/2013 18:16 PM

Wow! He's going to keep score! Can't you picture the spreadsheet taped to the fridge? Different "favors" have different point levels. Then there is the timer going because surely you must return the favor within a reasonable amount of time or it doesn't count. You must keep point levels even, of course!

Now, let's imagine what these favors might be, shall we?

His favors and point value

1,000 - Opens a door for you
2,000 - Brings you a glass of water
5,000 - Makes coffee in the morning and brings you a cup
10,000 - Makes you dinner
100,000 - Changes your flat
250,000 - Cleans the snow/ice off your car in the morning
500,000 - Mows your lawn

Your favors and point value (point value subject to change based on quality of favor)

5 - Blow job
5 - Do his laundry
5 - Make him dinner
5 - Do his taxes for him
5 - Re-shingle his roof

thebighurt posted 10/29/2013 18:22 PM

Different "favors" have different point levels.

OMG! I quickly read this and saw *different "flavors"*!!!! I thought this was a reference to the flavor of one's *freshness*!


Snapdragon posted 10/29/2013 18:39 PM

Well, I suppose we could put "Keeping a good flavor" on the list of favors!

clralb posted 10/29/2013 19:38 PM

Ha! What a dork.

His mantra is, Me, me, me, me, me ...

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