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Integrity...partial rant, some profanity

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StillLivin posted 10/29/2013 15:28 PM

So, Iíve been NC with @sswh0le. He cheated, and then he ran like a punk. He has blameshifted, outright lied, snuck around, got his 20 years junior mistress pregnant. Uhgggg, the list goes on and on. I donít have hate in my heart, as he likes to claim, but I had a whole lot of hurt lodged up in there. Iíve been trying to heal. It doesnít help that he would text and email (because I refused to answer his phone calls) how Iím so horrible of a person, that I donít deserve to be loved (almost his exact words), and that his A was my fault because I was such an evil BÖh!
I have taken the high road to all of his ugly, hateful comments. Until last Thursday.
Our dog, Max, was bitten 3X by a rattlesnake. I LOVE my dog. STBXH was often jealous of just how much love I have for my ďrealĒ man in the home. You know, the faithful, brave, loving dog.
Fast forward: Iím driving 90 MPH to the animal hospital and I called him sobbing. I thought my baby was going to die beside me. It was one of the worst feelings Iíve ever had. So STBWXH was actually ok, at first. They immediately got him on pain meds and ran bloodwork. The tech came in and told me the estimate was between $3,900 and $4,800, if nothing else happened to my dog. I relayed the information to STBWXH. He told me he didnítí have it. Did I explode on him that he just spent over $9,000 on his Shrek lookalike whore in less than one month. $9,000!!!!!!!! NO. I said I understood. I started sobbing because I didnít have that kind of money either and was going to have to take my dog home and watch him die a painful death right in front of me.
He attacked. Told me I made money (he makes 11X more money than me). Wow, seriously. I blasted him. I was hopped up on adrenaline and completely devastated that I was going to have to watch my poor baby die. Did I say how much I LOVE my dog???? Yeah, blasted was an understatement. Then I went on to tell him every single thing wrong with his weak pathetic @ss. I even told him how his stupid whore was flirting with the PI I had hired. Yeah, I had saved that gem for a rainy day!
I had previously sent him pictures of our dogís face. So, when he went on shift and accessed his email, he finally saw for himself what I had been dealing with.
Side note, the neighborís daughter was a vet tech and they called to tell me to take him to the hospital she worked at. OMG we saved 70% from what the first hospital was quoting. I didnít hesitate to pay that amount because I had it.
Now, moron calls and texts me all times of the day and night and wants to pay whatever amount. He was even crying two of the times.
The integrity part comes in. The first bill was the total price without the discount. She sent the second bill in a different email. Why why why did I send him the correct bill. I could have pocketed that money. I really NEED that money too. Though, I do believe that Karma or balance hits. So I really hope my integrity pays off in some really great Karma points. Was I stupid????
And next question, why is he now calling, emailing and texting soooo much? Our dog took a turn for the worse and almost didnít make it the first 2 days, but he is doing fantastic now! Is this the hovering??

Swims posted 10/29/2013 15:43 PM

First of all, hugs to you for all that you have been through and that Max will be OK. Its a horrible feeling when our dogs suffer, they have no voice. So.... he is a proven asshole. Is there any way you can send the first invoice and tell him it is the final bill? Communicate in that way only..... Until he $$$$ up? Then, FTG!!!!

Hope2B posted 10/29/2013 15:44 PM

Don't ever apologize for having integrity! You are not stupid!

Also, don't apologize if it ever happens that you get to drive the Karma bus (that would be if you had sent STBXH the higher bill) because, hey, you have to do your part in providing a bit more balance to the universe.

The first Doggie ER place stabilized Max. That bill for the pain meds and blood work will be coming in for your STBXH to pay too, right?

I LOVE my dogs, and I would have done exactly as you did, racing to the Doggie ER Animal Hospital etc. I would have sold a kidney to save my dogs!

SO GLAD to read Max is doing better! I know sometimes the vets will work with you on a payment plan, but I'm so glad about your neighbor's daughter/vet tech/another hospital.

I am so glad you blasted your STBXH. Some people are so dense it takes a blasting to get through the concrete that is their brain!

I love my dogs! Faithful, brave, loving... people could take a page from their book and be better for it.

StillLivin posted 10/29/2013 16:15 PM

Nope, I just can't do it. Something in me would snap if I cheated him of money or anything else. I'm honest, and I have integrity. It is just who I am. I am sometimes sickened by my own integrity when all he has done has shown so much lack, but I refuse to be like him.
And it gets better...tee hee hee he is saved under McOgreLover on my phone. He just called, again. And the announcement gave me a good laugh...but anywho
Now he wants me to stay in constant contact for the next few weeks to give him upcoming follow up bills.
Oh, and when he gets back from Afghanistan, he is coming to get HIS dog. Yeah right, over my dead body will I let my baby go live with him and whore. Gonna see about getting assistance financially with some of these bills so I won't ever be financially dependent on him again for anything.

gonnabe2016 posted 10/29/2013 22:34 PM

No, SL, you aren't stupid for giving him the correct bill. You are doing what's *right.*

As for all of his texts/emails/whatnot....he's with Shrek. He gets *crickets* unless the communication is absolutely necessary......

StillLivin posted 10/30/2013 13:02 PM

Thank you gonnabe. Yes, it was full NC except financial crap. I hadn't talked to him in over a month or so.
He has found reasons to reach out, but unless it was necessary I even ignored the emails. I'm only "playing nice" because my dog is worth it.
As soon as he deposits the $$$ into the account so I can finish paying the vet bill, it will be back to NC. I can handle the follow up stuff on my own. Those bills shouldn't be too much.
And WHEN again am I going to win the lottery???

Ostrich80 posted 10/30/2013 14:04 PM

I really think situations where you have a choice to make a right /wrong/decision will come back and bite you in the ass if you choose the wrong. Integrity should never be followed by an apology, its always right choice. I'm so happily your dog is doing better.

StillLivin posted 10/30/2013 14:08 PM

Yes. I feel the same way and that's why I did the "right" thing. I am just mad that he constantly acts like "I'm" the sneaky one. He demanded the bill. When I didn't have it the first day due to technical difficulties and lack of sleep, he accused me of trying to get more money out of him. Our dog's face, neck, chest, and front paws were so swollen, he wasn't even recognizeable as a German Shepherd or even a dog. He knows that stuff wasn't cheap. I just felt like, dang if he is gonna accuse me of trying to swindle him, why not? But it just isn't who I am. And for that same reason, it's what separates me from being him or his stupid, fugly whore. Both are sneaks, liars, cheats, and basically just the dregs of society! I genuinely like who I am and am proud of who I am. He can't say that.
And thank you both, Swim and Hope2B. I forgot to thank you in my earlier posts.

Swims posted 10/30/2013 14:15 PM

Don't get me wrong, I would do exactly as you had done with the bill. What is it about us, the BS, that we ALWAYS play by the rules and the WS gets to make their own rules?? How much $ did he spend on Ms. Shrek? $9000? Ouch. Integrity in this case really hurts.

Swims posted 10/30/2013 14:18 PM

And I forgot to add, I'm happy that your beloved Max is recovering. That's what really matters!

StillLivin posted 10/30/2013 17:10 PM

$9000++++ in only one month.
I only had access to one of his accounts and 2 of his credit cards. I'm sure he spent more setting up their lurve nest.

hopingforhappy posted 10/30/2013 17:47 PM

When I win the lottery, I would be honored to pay your vet bill. You deserve it! Be proud of doing the right thing. Too bad more people in this world don't.

justdoit posted 10/30/2013 18:57 PM

Just a small t/j - my dog was bitten by a rattlesnake this summer also, and like you paid a bundle to save him! The emergency vet who treated him told us about "snake school". 2 weeks later both dogs went to snake school and it really works! Neither will go near anything that wiggles or makes a sound even close to a snake!

Also agree that hell would freeze over before anyone would separate me from my fur babies!

Ostrich80 posted 10/31/2013 14:14 PM

My sister lives in rattlesnake country and they get their dogs a shot that lessens the damage when they get bit. Snake school,? Hmmm I think my ws was a student there couldn't resist. Actually that's a really good idea.

StillLivin posted 10/31/2013 18:39 PM

Yes, I had fully intended on sending him. Where I am at it is a little pricey. Between the $4G for lawyer, the other $5.5G to pay off collective debt before LS date, and the trauma of him threatening to leave and then actually leaving, well, I didn't have the funds or the energy to pursue him getting the training. He usually is NEVER outside without me. He is well very well trained and knows stop, wait, heel, very very well. So I had put it off until next spring.
As for the anti venom shots, that will forever after be part of his shots program. And, yes, he will have the training come very early spring next year.

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