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How do I know if D is right?

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maddmurph posted 10/31/2013 09:19 AM

Part of me wants to work on things, part of me thinks I want to stay so I'm not a 33 year old divorced father of two and the rest of me just wants it all over. How do I know if I just need to cut my losses?

lieshurt posted 10/31/2013 09:24 AM

Well, what I've learned over the years is to focus on their actions and not their words. If your WS is doing the hard work to get to the root of and deal with their issues, then you have hope to heal and R. If they aren't remorseful at all, just give you lip service and just want you to rugsweep everything, then run like hell to an attorney and don't look back.

maddmurph posted 10/31/2013 09:36 AM

If your WS is doing the hard work to get to the root of and deal with their issues, then you have hope to heal and R.

I don't know, she seems to be. Then I just don't feel like trying and not sure what is keeping me here.

lieshurt posted 10/31/2013 09:56 AM

She says I'm not doing anything to make her want to come back. When she says that it makes sense to me, that I should be doing something. She wants notes and flowers, part of me says sure why not? The rest of me is like why are you crawling back to her?
She stomped around all grumpy this morning but left me a little card.

From what you posted, she doesn't appear to be truly remorseful to me.

sparkysable posted 10/31/2013 11:42 AM

I went back and read your previous posts.... and if you want me to be the one to say it, I'll do it.

Divorce is the right thing.

You would NOT be making a mistake, you would NOT be overracting, you would NOT be missing out on your one true love. She has NO intention of changing her behavior, in fact, she's taking her infidelity underground.

If you need more evidence to really see the light, then do it. Put a GPS tracker in her car, install a keylogger, put a VAR in her car, whatever.

I'm telling you, run from this broken, disordered mess.

Thefly559 posted 10/31/2013 11:48 AM

Brother I am sorry. I also read your post and if you have to ask the question then you already know the answer. Good luck

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