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Everyone think WH is such a good guy

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blue8888 posted 11/1/2013 10:41 AM

Hate it. All everyone else including OW gets to see is this charming, charismatic, good guy. He actually told me last night that by cheating on me repeatedly, he did me a favor. He said it's because our marriage doesn't work. Yeah, it doesn't work when you won't stop cheating. He also called me bitter for being mad that he did all this. I know, back to 180 while I have to live with him. I was doing so well, shouldn't have said something to him, he is way too delusional and stuck in his fog.

OldCow18 posted 11/1/2013 10:51 AM

I'm sorry he's being a complete ass.

I totally relate to the good guy thing, they just LOVE him at work, and he's head coach for my daughter's team and the parents think he is the greatest effing thing since sliced bread. It makes me INSANE. They think he's superman and probably think poor guy has to deal with such a debbie downer wife, if they only freaking knew.

callmecrazy posted 11/1/2013 10:51 AM

Wow...you are married to God and didnt even know it Hugs blue. NPD's are awful to deal with bc there is really just no use if its bad.

gonnabe2016 posted 11/1/2013 11:12 AM

Yea, I've dealt with this too. Stbx has even told me that all his friends/family see him as a great, fun-loving guy and can't understand why I'm so *hard* on him.

Your WH isn't foggy. He is 100% delusional. And dealing with this type of crap is NO fun. Telling you that he has done you a *favor* -- what a jackwagon. *smh*

As a heads-up to you -- if/when you begin the D process you'll no longer be accused of being 'bitter.' You'll be accused of being bitter AND greedy......

heforgotme posted 11/1/2013 11:13 AM

everyone else including OW gets to see is this charming, charismatic, good guy

This drives me insane. WH was always good on "vacation". When there was nothing to worry about......no stress. It kills me that this was the only side it ever got to see of him. Sure it was great, but it also wasn't real.......

Ostrich80 posted 11/1/2013 11:14 AM

I totally relate to the good guy thing, they just LOVE him at work, and he's head coach for my daughter's team and the parents think he is the greatest effing thing since sliced bread. It makes me INSANE. They think he's superman and probably think poor guy has to deal with such a debbie downer wife, if they only freaking knew.

Oldcow...you just described my ws to
a T.
He's the funny, patient, charismatic, great father, who's married to that lady who always looks pissed. Usually because he's verbally attacked me before we roll out of the fucking car!!!! I can't even count how many mothers have told me, YOUR SO LUCKY TO HAVE A HUSBAND LIKE THAT AND HE'S SUCH A WONDERFUL DAD. my kids and I just roll our eyes...

Chippednotbroken posted 11/1/2013 11:17 AM

I was just feeling like this last night when his mother (she supposedly knows as he told her) what a great dad he was and wasn't it so great that he got excited about trick or treating. Yes that's great would be even better if he hadnt stuck his dick in other "treats". That might be really great.

emotionalgirl posted 11/1/2013 11:19 AM

I think many of our WH are like this....mine can literally be a whole different person when someone visits the house or we are out and the minute we are alone at home its like a mask falls into place. I swear Jekyll and Hyde. It has always bugged the hell out of me that nobody gets to see the person that I actually live with every single day!

OldCow18 posted 11/1/2013 11:40 AM

He's the funny, patient, charismatic, great father, who's married to that lady who always looks pissed. Usually because he's verbally attacked me before we roll out of the fucking car!!!! I can't even count how many mothers have told me, YOUR SO LUCKY TO HAVE A HUSBAND LIKE THAT AND HE'S SUCH A WONDERFUL DAD.

EXACTLY!!! Meanwhile, the ONLY reason he is SO DEDICATED to her team is so that he has an EXCUSE to never be home and focus on something other than the disasterous mess he made here at home. Asshat.

[This message edited by OldCow18 at 11:42 AM, November 1st (Friday)]

blue8888 posted 11/1/2013 12:34 PM

It's driving me mad. I got to listen to one of his guy friends yesterday saying he is such an awesome guy.
Also his mom is SO proud of him for being such a great man and father. Ha, he rarely wants to do a thing with the kids. He is all about his computer and his "whores." I know OW will eventually see some of this but it kills me how many other people think he is so wonderful.

blue8888 posted 11/1/2013 12:38 PM

Oh and the reason I said anything at all was because I have been asking him to set an appt that is important for me and one of our sons. He has to make this particular appt or believe me, I would do it myself. He keeps telling me he has not had time to do it. I see on our cell phone bill that he has plenty of time to message OW all day at work though.

chinup posted 11/1/2013 16:22 PM

Mine is so great too! He is all about the appearance in public so people see a great guy, great father , great husband but in private we often get ignored or contempt . I was surprises yesterday when his best friend got a glimpse if the not so nice guy yesterday.

WH had made costume for son and son was complaining it was uncomfortable . WH didn't care, told him he had to wear it or he couldn't trick or treat. Nice dad eh! He said all this at his best friend's house . He finally realized what he was doing and helped fix the costume but was still a jerk about it though trying to be more patient because friend was there. Unusual for him to be that way in front of his friends. I think he knew OW might be in neighborhood trick or treating and was distracted. Otherwise, he is Mr. Fun cool nice guy best friend to everyone but his own children are afraid of him. Ugh!

Then of course I look like the bitchy grumpy wife while he's all mr happy pants. He should have dressed up as a dick for Halloween!

[This message edited by chinup at 4:43 PM, November 1st (Friday)]

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