Cheating Hurt by Infidelity
Betrayal Wayward Donations lying



Find a Local Counselor

The Healing Library


Contact Us
In Association with
Infidelity -
- Forum Archives

like us on facebook
You are not logged in. Login here or register.
Newest Member: Sarah5479 (61853)

User Topic: Hot flashes, menopause impacting emotional reactions?
♀ 35298
Member # 35298
Default  Posted: 10:13 PM, November 2nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Sorry to double post today, but it seems I just started hot flashes in the past month and periods irregular now so I guess I am going thru an early menopause. Could I be thinking less clearly? Could my anger be related? Or is it just my lying cheating husband that is legitimately ticking me off?

Posts: 129 | Registered: Apr 2012
Member # 40758
Default  Posted: 10:23 PM, November 2nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Be careful with this one. Prior to my discovery if WH, I thought my " irrational thinking" was early menopause. My WH had no problem saying this either. Though after DDay everything made sense. So just trust your Gut. And your symptoms are from your emotions from WS. I'm angry that all this gets blamed on our cycles!!
I'm angry and hurt now after DDay, but my thinking is clearer, and it is now an explained anger.

Posts: 116 | Registered: Sep 2013
♀ 36976
Member # 36976
Default  Posted: 10:29 PM, November 2nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

This is why women can't be President, right? You can't trust them not to PMS and hit the red button?? Doesn't that piss you off? Women (IMHO) are so less likely to get angry over nothing, and sister, you have a damned good reason to be angry.

Hot flashes suck. Emotionally they hit some women like PMS. I'm sure by this point you can differentiate.

Posts: 870 | Registered: Sep 2012
♀ 35298
Member # 35298
Default  Posted: 10:40 PM, November 2nd (Saturday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Yes, tying hot flashes or menopause to competency does piss me off, Right Track. I am a successful working person with a lot of responsibility and I don't doubt that my work decision making is the same as it ever was.

And Catatonic, I can only imagine how upsetting it would be to share concern over this issue with a spouse and be gas lighted (lit?) in the process.

I am finding I have regular hot flashes at night and also when I get angry, I get all red and feel a wave of heat come over me like a hot flash - seems hormonal because I never got this before. Does this happen to others and does it ... I don't know, spike my anger?

Posts: 129 | Registered: Apr 2012
♀ 32912
Member # 32912
Default  Posted: 8:21 AM, November 3rd (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


Get yourself checked out first before you assume it is early menopause. My periods have been irregular for over a year and about 6 months ago I started getting mild hot flashes. I found my emotions were definitely affected. I was all over the place, angry, sad, up one minute, down the next. I have never really suffered from PMS type symptoms before probably because for most of my child bearing years I have been on the Pill. I went to my Dr and got my hormone levels checked. They were in the peri-menopause ranges. He has since placed me back on a very low dose BCP to regulate my periods for the next 6-9 months until I potentially go into full menopause. It has helped immensely with my mood swings. The hot flashes are gone and I am sleeping much better. I am able to think more clearly (though I still don't have any answers about what I should do in my situation with

Me-BW 47, now 52
SAWH 48, now 54
Married 25 years, now 30 years
4 children
D-Day 26/07/11
Multiple PAs, ONS, Porn
In limbo land

Posts: 302 | Registered: Jul 2011
Alex CR
♀ 27968
Member # 27968
Default  Posted: 8:48 AM, November 3rd (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

No 2x4's please....but as one who is now well past menopause, my behavior during those days were not something I'm proud of as I wasn't always the nicest person. I do believe the emotional upheaval and unpredictability were a symptom of menopause.

I remember days hating everyone and everything. I felt so angry that nothing my kids or my H did would be right and I could never really put my finger on why. The old feelings that used to happen a couple days before my monthly now seemed to be popping up unpredictably and were much more intense.

This edginess was not my personality or way of handling life before my 40's when peri-menopause started and it's not my manner now that I am through all of it. In hindsight, I can see my reactions were out or proportion to the event I was upset or angry reactions were definitely intense at those times. I also found myself crying at commercials or sentimental stories, something I've never done before or since.

I never did take hormones or any of that 'bio-identical' stuff after studying up on compounding pharmacies and the scams out there, but I did make it through it and, for me, the other side of menopause is heavenly.....

BS Me 63
WS Him 64
Married 35
Together 41
DD 11/16/09
I can dwell in the negative or seek the road is lonely...the other teeming with life.

Posts: 1861 | Registered: Mar 2010
♂ 41150
Member # 41150
Default  Posted: 9:50 AM, November 3rd (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

WW is going through menopause (just turned 46). Complains of hot flashes nearly constantly. Also on Effexor for the menopause and at least 2 other psychoactive drugs.

She is showing at least two distinct personalities. #1 is reserved, but civil. #2 is someone I have never seen in our 12 years together: hateful, mean, intentionally hurtful, and one thing that really surprises me... a filthy mouth.

In either mode she is completely irrational. Refuses to accept any responsibility. Gaslights every conversation. Refuses to admit she has been seen with OM. Just simply denies everything.

Refuses to consider seeing either her Dr or a MC. Says the problem is 100% me, because our marriage "isn't a fairy tale anymore".

Any chance she will come to her senses if I wait her out?

Follow your BRAIN.
Your HEART is stupid as shit.

Posts: 294 | Registered: Oct 2013
♀ 40032
Member # 40032
Default  Posted: 12:50 PM, November 3rd (Sunday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

It might be early menopause. Your doc can help you figure that out and help you get your hormones balanced if that's what you want. I've been in surgical menopause for awhile now due to full hysterectomy.

Stress may also be fueling a hormone imbalance which can cause hot flashes too. This can intensify anger and make it harder to deal with complex situations like infidelity.

[This message edited by whattheh at 12:53 PM, November 3rd (Sunday)]

Posts: 1396 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: USA
Topic Posts: 8

Return to Forum This Topic is Archived
© 2002 - 2017 All Rights Reserved.