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devotedfool68 posted 11/5/2013 21:26 PM

I haven't posted since February. I have held on as tightly as I can. WW took a detour in our marriage. She fell hard for another guy and committed the unforgivable.... However, I have wanted to forgive since the very beginning. I am the poster child for TT and un remorseful wife. She caught STD, held on to the idea of him for as long as she could and yet, I held on. Now she appears to be de-fogging. I can only hope that this is for real.
My thoughts: To anyone new to this, stand your ground and kick them out if they are not remorseful, it may come, but even if it does, after months of TT, you will question the sincerity. Those that say they kicked the wayward out, they know if remorse is genuine. Either the wayward left, or they showed remorse immediately. The doubt is un-bearable Be strong and stand your ground.

[This message edited by devotedfool68 at 6:50 AM, November 6th (Wednesday)]

cluless posted 11/6/2013 00:18 AM

What "if" you DON'T know what your ground is?

devotedfool68 posted 11/11/2013 10:13 AM


Decide what you need from them to stay in the marriage. Set your boundaries etc. Tell them what you need and if they are not willing to do that for you, then they are not remorseful. Start the process of getting out. Do not threaten unless you can follow through. Empty threats only strengthen your WH's belief that he can have it both ways.

Sorry for your pain. It DOES get better.

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