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General :
Cutting the WS off

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 No12turn2 (original poster member #40996) posted at 4:57 PM on Friday, November 8th, 2013

I've tried multiple angles to try and get R started with my WW. She is only interested in separation right now and claims that it isn't over, but will not work on us until then. I told her "it's really quite simple. You either want to be married to me, or you don't". I've decided to cut her off.

Monetarily: Unless it's food and gas which the court has ordered until she moves out. Still paying the bills as well.

Communication: Only talking to her, when needed, about the separation and our girls.

Emotionally: I have invested in my own well being and could care less what happens to her at the moment.

Sexually: Not an issue anyway since we haven't been intimate since 4 August (her choice). I have decided that if the time comes, I will not accept her advances or any pictures she tries to send me like she has before.

Friendship: This has been her main request. She wants me in her life no matter what happens. I have news for you sweetie, I have friends I haven't spoken to in years who treat me better than you do.

Attention: Oh lawd. This one is going to get under her skin. All alone in this state that she hates so much and No12turn2. Hmmm....That is ironic. She did have a guy at work ask her out on a date but refused and said she was married. Maybe she will change her mind, not my concern anymore.

Give a f#ck factor: This one is easy. She burned me out when she had a meltdown about the OM. It's been 1.5 months since they spoke and she still feels more for him than me. The funny thing is, he seems to get it. He is trying to work things out with his wife.

Me/BS 35
WW 32
M 12 yrs 2 Girls 10 & 7
Phone/Cyber Affairs (3 D-Days)
Status: DIVORCED 4/24/2014

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.

posts: 534   ·   registered: Oct. 15th, 2013   ·   location: United Staes
id 6554789
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StillStanding1 ( member #40144) posted at 5:02 PM on Friday, November 8th, 2013

Just want to say I am sorry for how much you are hurting. You are doing things right! Get strong for yourself. She has some harsh wake up calls coming her way. Good for you to resist her attempts to manipulate you! Keep up the good work. I know how hard it is...

Me: BS50s Him: WH50s
M 25 years - DD DS DS
LTA = 2+ yrs, Dday - 2/13, S for 1 year, now R

posts: 1632   ·   registered: Aug. 1st, 2013   ·   location: Midwest
id 6554797
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StillStanding1 ( member #40144) posted at 5:04 PM on Friday, November 8th, 2013

Double post

[This message edited by StillStanding1 at 11:06 AM, November 8th (Friday)]

Me: BS50s Him: WH50s
M 25 years - DD DS DS
LTA = 2+ yrs, Dday - 2/13, S for 1 year, now R

posts: 1632   ·   registered: Aug. 1st, 2013   ·   location: Midwest
id 6554798
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Pass ( member #38122) posted at 5:46 PM on Friday, November 8th, 2013

You're doing great, No12! You are strong and level-headed. Keep up the good work!

Divorced the cheater and living my best life now.

The best thing about hitting rock bottom is that everything after that looks fucking fabulous.

posts: 3785   ·   registered: Jan. 14th, 2013   ·   location: Ontario, Canada
id 6554858
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 No12turn2 (original poster member #40996) posted at 7:43 PM on Friday, November 8th, 2013

I'm trying. The hard part is she seems to be cool with this for now. I don't think it will last long. Just have to be strong

Me/BS 35
WW 32
M 12 yrs 2 Girls 10 & 7
Phone/Cyber Affairs (3 D-Days)
Status: DIVORCED 4/24/2014

No one can make you feel inferior without your consent.

posts: 534   ·   registered: Oct. 15th, 2013   ·   location: United Staes
id 6555003
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