I did the same thing the first holiday season. Four holiday season's later, still don't like them as much, but they are less painful. Take care of yourself and do not try to "make" your self enjoy them. If it doesn't feel right, don't do it.
We did start some new holiday traditions. My H and I now cook the holiday goodies together to give to friends. Before, that was something I did alone. It does give us time together and we enjoy the memories. His first pecan pies were extra buttery as he doubled the required butter....of course we still laugh about that.
Just go slow and do what feels comfortable.