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nowiknow23 (original poster member #33226) posted at 5:59 PM on Monday, November 11th, 2013
Today marks 4 weeks since Mom's feedings were withdrawn. She is weak, tired, and not very responsive. Today the hospice nurse talked with my Dad, and he decided that it's time to stop giving her water, which has been prolonging the inevitable.
Dad is wrecked at having to make yet another choice that speeds up her passing. All nine of us kids and all seven of Mom's siblings support the decision. I don't think that's much comfort to Dad, however.
It has been a torturous month for everyone, wanting Mom to be at peace, jumping at each ring of the phone, trying to carry on with everyday life while our hearts and minds are in that room day in and day out. It's has been exhausting and painful and yet beautiful all at once.
If you could, please hold my Mom and Dad in your thoughts. Send him comfort during these last hours and send her peace for her journey. Thank you in advance.
You can call me NIK
And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane
okaynow ( member #13813) posted at 6:04 PM on Monday, November 11th, 2013
(((NIK))) Prayers sent for you, your mom, dad, and whole family.
Married 18 yrs, together 25+.
D-day: 2/18/07.
1 child
The story doesn't really matter anymore. Time is a great healer. Life is good.
MovingUpward ( member #14866) posted at 6:04 PM on Monday, November 11th, 2013
(((NIK and NIK's Mom and Dad)))
They will be in my thoughts
ISPIFFD ( member #26367) posted at 6:05 PM on Monday, November 11th, 2013
I'm so sorry you and your dad and your whole family are going through the prolonged sadness of this situation. We went through it with Mom years ago, and I went through it with Dad last year. Sending you and your family all the best and most peaceful thoughts.
I'm done here; sick of 2 x 4s
authenticnow ( member #16024) posted at 6:06 PM on Monday, November 11th, 2013
(((NIK and Family)))
Your family has been in my thoughts this whole time. I will continue sending prayers for peace for all of you.
DS, you are forever in my heart. Thank you for sharing your beautiful spirit with me. I will always try to live by the example you have set. I love you and miss you every day and am sorry you had to go so soon, it just doesn't seem fair.
woundedby2 ( member #18522) posted at 6:36 PM on Monday, November 11th, 2013
Continued prayers. (((NIK)))
In 2010 I divorced the NPD assclown who cheated on me with my best friend.
Everybody, soon or late, sits down to a banquet of consequences.
~Robert Louis Stevenson
tushnurse ( member #21101) posted at 6:38 PM on Monday, November 11th, 2013
(((NIK, Dad and family))))
Find peace and strength in each other, and know that you are going to be a source of reassurance and strength for your dad.
May she just go to sleep.
((((and peace))))
Me: FBSHim: FWSKids: 23 & 27 Married for 32 years now, was 16 at the time.D-Day Sept 26 2008R'd in about 2 years. Old Vet now.
JKL Vikings ( member #32094) posted at 6:50 PM on Monday, November 11th, 2013
Her- Alpha Female 42
Me-FWH 44
Married since '02, together since 2000
D-day 2/10/2009
3 sons- J- born Oct 2001
K- born Sept. 2005
L- born Apr. 2008
We ALL have issues. It's how we deal with them that makes the difference
lost_in_toronto ( member #25395) posted at 6:55 PM on Monday, November 11th, 2013
((NIK and family))
I'm sorry your father, and your family, are facing such heartbreaking choices. Wishing you all peace in the coming days.
Me: BS/48
Him: WS/46
DDay: August 23, 2009
Together 23 years.
Reconciled.
hardtimesinlife ( member #10468) posted at 7:11 PM on Monday, November 11th, 2013
Those are the hardest decisions to make because the guilt on top of grief is so difficult, no matter how many people tell you it is for the best.
Prayers to your family.
(((nik)))
Ddays 2004 & 2007
I cut my losses mid 2013
Feeling happier every day :)
ThoughtIKnewYa ( member #18449) posted at 7:14 PM on Monday, November 11th, 2013
Jrazz ( member #31349) posted at 7:18 PM on Monday, November 11th, 2013
Sending good thoughts and love and comfort.
(((NIK)))
"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." - Deeply Scared's mom
Aubrie ( member #33886) posted at 7:19 PM on Monday, November 11th, 2013
(((((NIK))))))
Lifting you all in prayers.
"Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyway." - J. Wayne
metamorphisis ( member #12041) posted at 7:39 PM on Monday, November 11th, 2013
Sending you and your family love NIK. 
Go softly my sweet friend. You will always be a part of who I am.
still2suspicious ( member #31722) posted at 7:40 PM on Monday, November 11th, 2013
Just went thru this with my aunt.
Sending all the comfort prayers can give.
(((NIK and family)))
Me: BSHim: WHDDay: LTEA Every storm runs out of rain - Gary Allen
D final 2/23
jo2love ( member #31528) posted at 7:51 PM on Monday, November 11th, 2013
((((Nik and family))))
Keeping you and your family in my thoughts.
sisoon ( Moderator #31240) posted at 7:53 PM on Monday, November 11th, 2013
Thank you for the update. Count me in.
(((NIK & family)))
fBH (me) - on d-day: 66, Married 43, together 45, same sex apDDay - 12/22/2010Recover'd and R'edYou don't have to like your boundaries. You just have to set and enforce them.
Deeply Scared ( Administrator #2) posted at 7:59 PM on Monday, November 11th, 2013
(((NIK & family)))
Holding you close and sending you peaceful thoughts...I'm so very sorry
"Don't give up, the beginning is always the hardest." My Mom:)
My tolerance for stupid shit is getting less and less.
deeplysad ( member #16590) posted at 8:10 PM on Monday, November 11th, 2013
Me: BW - I'm much too young to feel this damn old
Him: FWH - Midlife crisis with a pathetic porn wannabe
D-Day: August 2004; Lots of false R until February 2005.
itainteasy ( member #31094) posted at 8:28 PM on Monday, November 11th, 2013
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