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lost and heartbroken

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arimomma101 posted 11/13/2013 22:36 PM

I told myself it was nothing and that i shouldnt be worried why cheat when you have a loving wife and a beautiful two year old daughter. But i did start to wonder when i seen he called another girl beautiful...why did he not compliment me anymore as i got more worried i seen my fears come to life as he joined dating sites and emailed "easy" women im so stuck girls laugh at me and call me stupid i dont want to get hurt but im already hurting do i walk away or do i give him the 100th lost :(

Crushed1 posted 11/13/2013 23:45 PM

Hugs (((arimomma101))). The reason a person cheats can only be found within themselves. YOU and your beautiful daughter did not cause him to cheat and you are not to blame in any way for his despicable actions. Have you confronted him about what you know?

Gr8Lady posted 11/14/2013 00:16 AM

WH cheats not because it is right, but because HE CAN.

Big difference. He doesn't need a reason. You could be attractive, compassionate with all the correct traits. He doesn't need a reason, you Are enough. He has the problem, not you.
Big difference, it is not your fault.

annb posted 11/14/2013 07:50 AM

Hi, arimomma, welcome to SI. I am so sorry you are dealing with this nightmare in your life!

Have you read the articles in The Healing Library in the upper left-hand corner? They will help you to understand how to process your life being turned upside down.

There are also some great articles for newbies in this Just Found Out forum, scroll down and find the ones with the target icon on the left-hand side.

Only you know how much you can tolerate...keep in mind there is never room for two in a marriage, from your post it sounds as though your husband is a repeat cheater? Is he willing to go to counseling?

The best thing you can do for yourself right now is take care of you and your daughter. Be good to yourself. Get out of the house to get your mind off of the affairs, go for long walks, stop at a coffee shop, meet friends, walk the mall...anything to keep you busy and at the same time you will be spending quality time with your daughter.


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