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question about boundaries and texting

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Alyssamd24 posted 11/14/2013 10:52 AM

Since starting at my new job I have been trying to be aware of my boundaries at work.....both with colleagues and with clients.

So my dilemma (not a major one) is this: at my job the majority of my coworkers (including my boss) use texting as the major form of communication with our clients.

The reason for this is the majority of our clients are poor and it is easier for them to text rather than talk on the phone because that way they can save up their minutes. I understand this but am still a bit wary about it.

I feel like texting is more personal than calling, especially in a professional setting.

How do I keep my professional boundary up while texting clients?

Sam793 posted 11/14/2013 11:00 AM

The way I see it is that if this is a necessary means of communication then use the same protocol as you would on the phone. If the boundary is being crossed then put a stop to it. Email used to be less personal then it is today. It's a major form of communication and as new ones evolve, we also need to.

confetticheck posted 11/14/2013 11:18 AM

Hey A,
I think its great your getting way out in front of this one.

Tell him your feeling weird about this and you wanted to talk about it. "I want you to know what I'm doing and how I feeling about it, I want you to check my text messages every night after work or at your convenience" Or something along those lines?

Get him involved, let him know your on top of this.
I think it was a great trust builder for both of us,especially me, to set boundaries and for me to stick to them like a hawk! I can't take my cell into the bathroom alone because it freaks her out.
So be it! It makes her feel secure.

Keep on keepn on!

Mrs Panda posted 11/14/2013 15:49 PM

Don't overthink it. There is normal texting and then there is boundary crossing. You should know the difference. Easy litmus test is this. If you wouldn't want your BH to see the text, it shouldn't be sent.

I text male work colleagues all the time for my job. I don't send anything inappropriate but I am certainly friendly.

Mrs Panda posted 11/14/2013 15:49 PM

Don't overthink it. There is normal texting and then there is boundary crossing. You should know the difference. Easy litmus test is this. If you wouldn't want your BH to see the text, it shouldn't be sent.

I text male work colleagues all the time for my job. I don't send anything inappropriate but I am certainly friendly.

Card posted 11/16/2013 13:10 PM

One of the boundaries in place in our marriage....

We never delete texts until the other has had a chance to look at our messages.....
Then, and only then, do we delete history..... We have no secrets and never ask for privacy on the phone.

harrypotter posted 11/17/2013 04:28 AM

I agree good that your ahead of this one and thinking about how it might affect your BS. Ask them how they want to handle things, what they are comfortable with and then do it.
The way I see it, it's as simple as that. Good luck.

UnexpectedSong posted 11/17/2013 18:54 PM

What Mrs. Panda said.

I text with male colleagues all the time - we go from email to IM to text to phone on a dime. No one method is more personal than another, in my company. As long as you maintain the same boundaries everywhere, you'll be fine.

Dance4Me posted 11/18/2013 17:57 PM

My H had a texting addiction with young coworkers - if he chooses to text a female coworker again - I will leave. He only uses email as a form of communication now (besides phone calls.). Emails, using his work address, can be easily monitored - texts can't. I do realize that if he wants to cheat again, he could find away with all the secret texting methods out there.

So far...so good!

[This message edited by Dance4Me at 5:59 PM, November 18th (Monday)]

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