SurvivingInfidelity.com Forum Archives

Return to Forum List

HB, lingerie, & sex. (Tmi) Help I'm weird.

You are not logged in. Login here or register.

Yakamishi posted 11/14/2013 17:24 PM

Ok, this is probably TMI, and at the very least, a little weird. Probably more than a little.

MY WW and I are 14 months out. She had an EA/PA for 3 years on and off. Reconciliation has a been a bit of a rollercoaster. (I know preaching to the choir, right?)But we are doing real well. And the good days DEFINITELY outnumber the bad.

We had HB during the initial 6 months or so. However, I'm not sure it stopped. We still have sex 5-6 times a week.And if I had my way it would probably be every day. Not necessarily for the physical part, but for the love. And perhaps...validation. The sex is terrific and we both enjoy it. Although WW would prefer slightly less, about 4 times per week. Pre D Day our sex life I considered good, about twice a week. I'm not complaining about the present, but isn't HB supposed to wind down further than this?

This is embarrassing to put it mildly, but another odd "side effect" I've experienced is my desire to buy lingerie for WW. It's almost compulsive. We joke every time we go shopping that I'll need to go by the lingerie aisle and pick up something. I honestly enjoy buying the items for her and like to see her dressed up. Before D Day I would buy her something maybe once a year or so. Now it's like once or twice a month. I don't now what it is. Whether it's linked to HB, like I'm trying to regain control or something?

I sometimes wonder, or worry, that I'm developing some sort of sex addiction. But the desires only involve my WW. Sure, I look at other woman, but there is zero desire. Not even from a revenge affair stand point.

So is this real freaking strange or what?

Mrs Panda posted 11/14/2013 18:30 PM

can you afford it? Does she like it? If so, I don't see Much of a problem.

maybe you are afraid of losing the "fire" and are using this as a tool to avoid more intimacy?

Certainly doesn't sound like a sex addiction as you are doing this for your wife and you .

I know every time I browse in some stores, I can't resist certain items. Books and makeup my weaknesses.

MartlArts posted 11/14/2013 18:36 PM

If you're both happy with this I can't see the issue either. And I'm no expert on SA, but if it's only your wife you desire I don't think that qualifies. Good for you both!

tushnurse posted 11/14/2013 18:40 PM

Not strange. That's great. We too had a decent sex life preA. Post A it's wild. 4-5-7 times a week. Lots of toys and lingere. It was liberating. But we have fun, and enjoy the intimacy. I say it's healthy. My teens think its weird.

StillGoing posted 11/14/2013 18:49 PM

Sounds normal to me. It will probably taper off but you're married and love each other, enjoy it.

SoVerySadNow posted 11/14/2013 18:54 PM

I say good for you, and have fun!

Return to Forum List

© 2002-2018 SurvivingInfidelity.com ®. All Rights Reserved.