SurvivingInfidelity.com^®

Just read that I can collect my FWH social security at age 62,if we are divorced for 2 years. His is quite a bit more than mine.

This may be a factor for me, as I am 59 right now and I am contemplating why I should spend the last third of my life with a liar???

Yes we have been in R for 5 years, but I believe he may be still lying (about money) and I am tired of being a watchdog.

If this SS news is good for me this might just be the impituss(sp)to make me take back my life.

Let me hear from all of you who are in this age bracket!!! or any laywers or accountants out their that can advise.

http://ssa-custhelp.ssa.gov/app/answers/detail/a_id/299/~/qualifying-for-divorced-spouse-benefits

According to the above link, you only have to have been married for 10 years in order to collect.

I don't know for sure but I was told you had to be married 10 years and you don't remarry.

At the time in comparison to the pain it didn't mean much to me at the time. I suppose it is something to look forward to in the future.

[This message edited by fireproof at 3:10 PM, November 16th (Saturday)]

I think that your ex-spouse has to be receiving SS, too. So if he delays taking it, that delays you getting it as well. Don't quote me on that...

But yes, married 10 years and you can't be remarried.

I just looked at the link....WooHoo! Another 3 years and 5 months and I can collect on my asshole second husband's SS benefits. *snicker*

Boy, is that gonna chap his ass.

Boy, is that gonna chap his ass.

My X too; I can't wait

My X too; I can't wait

From what I recall from looking into that a while ago, the exes (or 2nd wives) don't get notified.

Been married over 35 years, check.

He has been collecting SS for 4 years, check.

I am 59 and if we get divorced by the time I am 60, I can collect his SS at age 62. check.

Only questions is how much? I understand I can collect on mine or his, who ever is more?

Can this be? His is more than mine?

I understand I can collect on mine or his, who ever is more?

This is correct. You don't collect both, just one and you get to choose which one. I am not sure how it works and how you notify SS what you plan to do.

My understanding is this: you have to have been married for at least 10 years. He has to be at least *eligible* to collect, whether he does or not.

You have to have been unmarried for the previous two years (although I could be wrong about that, please check that one).

You can collect on his spousal benefit (which I think is half of his benefit) or you can collect on your own benefit.

The other thing you can do is to collect on the spousal benefit for a while and leave yours to mature until you're older, then change over and collect on yours at the higher rate.

And if he dies, you can collect the survivor benefit.

This is all regardless of whether he is collecting, remarried, whatever- it doesn't matter. And he will not be notified of what you're doing.

Please confirm all this, but I think I have it right.

Take a look here: http://www.ssa.gov/retire2/yourdivspouse.htm

It tells you exactly what you can get...

Sounds like good news for you. You can only collect one, and if his is larger that is factored in your favor.

I recall years ago, this gem fell into my beloved Aunts lap unexpectedly. ( back before Internet research). Her WH left her for someone 1/2 his age. We were so excited for my Aunt to receive the larger SS amount. Certainly made her life better.

And lying cheating WH got dumped by the younger woman, and my Aunt got sweet revenge by the higher SS check. She SO deserved every penny for what she was put through.

Good luck to you

I've got many years before I can think about collecting SS but I found out about this a few years ago (although I don't yet know the details). My mom is collecting benefits from her first ex husband. Ex and I were married 10 years and 5 months so it's something that is very relevant. It was actually a little comforting to know that spending 10 years with that jackass will at least give me a little more financial stability if I'm blessed to live a long life (thankfully without him!) It's not much of a consolation prize but it's something!

And if he dies, you can collect the survivor benefit.

This I did not know. I'll have to look into this.

Yes, it chaps my butt to know both wxh can both collect on my earnings. Fxh isnt marrying his gf because of that and other financial reasons. My only joy is that they are 4 and 5 years older than me and I refuse to retire until I'm 70.

If I ever get married again, I've got to fix my picker.

Grt8-are you collecting SS? I plan on collecting as soon as I can!

Yes I am collecting. I am also entitled to 1/2 his military disability pension when he dies. He is 100 percent disabled. Gets all kinds of benefits...no home tax, which will pass to me too.

Even if he remarries....I have been married 35 yrs so.new wife just gets the consolation prize...lying cheating man and I get pension.

I'm not a gold digger by any means, but I earned this for the emotional abuse I went thru. So do you!

You Go girl....take care of yourself. Sent you PM

I'm not a gold digger by any means, but I earned this for the emotional abuse I went thru. So do you!

You Go girl....take care of yourself. Sent you PM

That is so right, after all his entitlements!!! lol. I really am at the point where I feel entitled to do what I want. and I don't mean cheating. At almost 60 years old, still working, my kids are grown, I did a great job at that! Time for me. He has no pension, so I will be working for a very long time, but if I sell this house, we don't have a mtg., I could find a small home in Florida and live comfortably!

From what I hear, as long as you were married for over 10 years, if your ex-spouse is collecting Soc Sec, you can apply for, and receive, half of their benefits. And Soc Sec doesn't even tell them about it. For example, if he receives $500 a month, he would still receive his $500, and you would receive $250. Definitely go and apply if you can.

bumping because I missed this thread but read about this benefit today! I had NO idea about this. Of course my fellow SI-ers were ahead of the game. It may help someone else that also missed this thread.

http://www.ssa.gov/retire2/divspouse.htm

Does this work across borders? x is American... grin:

[This message edited by FaithFool at 2:33 PM, February 3rd (Monday)]