Topic: talk me down
Member # 37091
| Posted: 1:53 PM, November 16th (Saturday), 2013|
Oh god it just hit me that I want to close my eyes and never wake up. I honestly thought to myself, the world would be better off. I instantly reared back. WTH I thought I was past that point, I thought I was at a point where those types of throughts didn't creep in anymore....I'm so tired.
Posts: 3615 | Registered: Oct 2012
|mom of 2|
Member # 11214
| Posted: 2:16 PM, November 16th (Saturday), 2013|
I am SO sorry! Keep posting. I've been down that rabbit hole more times than I care to admit.
I can very much relate. Every goddamn time you think you're beyond "that", something will send you right over the edge. You're not alone.
Divorced after 23 years of M thanks to XH's truth trickle.
Status: Recovering and healing. It's going to be a long hard road.
Update November 2013: It only took seven years but I finally turned a corner. :)
Posts: 13392 | Registered: Jul 2006 | From: The suburbs of hell
Member # 40274
| Posted: 2:19 PM, November 16th (Saturday), 2013|
Go for a walk. Call a friend. Try to stop the monkey brain and meditate. Think about nothing, clear your head. Stay in the moment...take it minute by minute.
It will get better. You will be okay. Get some Zoloft. Every day it will get a little better.
Sorry! Hang in there.
Me BW- 40ish, awesome
Cheating scusband 40ish
2 kids, elementary school age
Bomb dropped Aug 4 out of nowhere...
Posts: 446 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: Hell
Member # 33523
| Posted: 2:26 PM, November 16th (Saturday), 2013|
Do you have any friends nearby that have a dog or cat that you can spend some time with? Even in my darkest, darkest, darkest days, that would always lift my spirits a little bit.
Me: fBW/MH 40s
3.26.13: Liberation day: D'd the whiny turd after being saddled with a serial cheating, NPD, jitbag 10 years too long
Now: happy in life, happily in love with the RIGHT man -----> Everything is as it should be
Posts: 940 | Registered: Oct 2011 | From: The Hostile City
Member # 40268
| Posted: 2:31 PM, November 16th (Saturday), 2013|
Stay off drugs! Hit the gym , go jogging , journal, do yoga, walk, go in a room by yourself and scream. Drugs and alcohol are the last things you need. The thoughts are just thoughts and severe depression is part of recovery. If you felt no pain then you should worry. You are strong you are important. You will get past this. And repeat!
"respect? you don't deserve it, you won't get any from me unless you earn it"
Posts: 1028 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: nyc
Member # 37455
| Posted: 2:34 PM, November 16th (Saturday), 2013|
You're starting a new life. Sometimes putting down the old baggage is the hardest part.
Call a friend. Call a family member. Go for a walk.
Above all else, remember, You are worth it!
BH 53, WW 44
DS 25(Mine),SD 24,SS 23(Hers),DS 11 Ours, DGS 5, DGD 2
D=Day #1 5/04EA (Rugswept)
D-Day #2 3/10/12, TT til 3/13/12
“I have no love for a friend who loves in words alone.”
― Sophocles, Antigone
Posts: 4841 | Registered: Nov 2012 | From: midwest
Member # 39885
| Posted: 2:46 PM, November 16th (Saturday), 2013|
Hang in there. Better times are ahead. I know you can do this because I didn't think I could and I am. Follow the advice you get here. It saved me. It'll save you
Divorced 7/11/14. New Beginning on the Gulf of Mexico. It's real nice.
Posts: 799 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: The beach.
Member # 32554
| Posted: 2:53 PM, November 16th (Saturday), 2013|
Honey, it's okay to be tired. It's okay to want to sleep. It's okay to wish this would all go away and you could wake up with everything magically all better.
I think we all get there more than once during this process.
The thing is, at least how this is how things float around in my brain, the thing is at least you're feeling something. You're feeling something. You're alive, and as long as there's life there's hope. Hope that better days are coming. And they are. Better days that you'll appreciate all the more because you worked hard to get to them.
Baby steps, sister. Baby steps. You'll get there.
Me = BS
Him = EX-d out (abusive troglodyte NPD SA)
3 tween-aged kids
Together 20 years
D-Day: Memorial Weekend 2011
2013 - DIVORCED!
Posts: 10722 | Registered: Jun 2011 | From: USA
Member # 37091
| Posted: 3:39 PM, November 16th (Saturday), 2013|
Thank you....I hugged my dog and talked to my boss who's a sweetheart. She has no idea what's going on but it helped. I spoke to a customer who had me laughing too. I know I'm better then those thoughts but sometimes they slap me out of nowhere and I think wth!? Thank you, all of you.
Posts: 3615 | Registered: Oct 2012
Member # 36857
| Posted: 3:45 PM, November 16th (Saturday), 2013|
Contact a doctor, be honest and describe your depression and get some medication.
Remember that the way you are feeling at this moment is temporary. You will feel differently tomorrow or the next day. You can do some things to influence how you're feeling. Start with the meds. Go from there.
I'm sorry you're feeling so defeated.
Post more if it will help. What brought this on? What has changed? What is your R status?
Me: BH 58.........Her: WW 45
DD: 8..........DS: 6 (5 and 2 on DDay)
Married for six years.
DDay: 12-25-11 Divorced: 7-15-12
Posts: 1288 | Registered: Sep 2012 | From: U.S.A.
Member # 40287
| Posted: 5:57 PM, November 16th (Saturday), 2013|
I think many of us had those moments. Stop and think about all the people who love you. I had two dark moments and look back now and think "why would have I ended it over such a selfish emotionally retarded douche bag." You deserve better than this and it will get better. Please just hang in there and come here for support. We all have your back. HUGS!!!!
BW - Me 43
WH - Cheating Swine 43
Dday - February 12, 2013....a week before I was to give birth to the child I miscarried and 12 days before our 5th anniversary.
Posts: 359 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: DFW
|Topic Posts: 11|