I so want her pain to be mine so that she can be free.
I understand where this is coming from , but self-flagellation is a road you don't want to go down either. The goal has to be for your family to work towards healthy and whole - together.
The fact that she is entertaining the thought of cutting means she may need clinical intervention. Why are you scared to help her find a therapist or doctor? Whatever your reason, if you can steel yourself to guide her towards getting help with this you will be guiding her down the most effective path to alleviating her pain.
Big hugs to all of you. Take small but positive steps every day.
[This message edited by Jrazz at 9:43 PM, November 16th (Saturday)]