[This message edited by littlemrsV0813 at 10:57 AM, November 20th (Wednesday)]
edited for typos (I always have to!)
Hugs to both of you. This is a long, tough, journey. Get help for yourself.
As a betrayed, I can tell you that the symptoms are similar and the feelings that go with them are close as well.
The sense of overwhelming loss of self, paralyzing sadness and 'learned helplessness' all fit.
No, it's not PTSD. But it can be difficult to tell the difference sometimes.
Her: WW/57 Me: BS/63 24yrs M 3 great kids, now 22, 20, 17 b,b,g D-Day 8/14/08, D 1/13/11
The VA is a great resource for both PTSD as well as family/ marital counceling. The right councelor is a valuable resource because thy have an extremely diverse exposure to PTSD.
I would suggest researching resources at the va a social worker will be your greatest ally. I have had nothing but good experience with the va resources.
Good luck.
"We're not broken, just bent. We can learn to love again."
I just got my intake paperwork for a therapist and it sucks that on the initial assessment I can answer "Extremely bothered" to almost every single assessment question.
Nervousness or shakiness, feeling sad or blue, heart pounding or racing, feeling hopeless about the future, feeling everything is an effort, spells of terror or panic, feelings of worthlessness, feeling no interest in things.
Yes, yes, yes to all of the above.
I am glad to say that it ultimately resolved once our marriage healed, but that was after treading a hard road for a few years.
[This message edited by SI Staff at 4:45 AM, November 19th (Tuesday)]
Married 11/05/2007-present. Dday: June 2009 Working through it. NOTE TO MODERATORS: I AM ALSO A BS!!!
My IC mentioned possible PTSD, but I'm thinking it was anxiety. For about 5 months after DD (during S), I has insomnia and night terrors. During the day I sometime felt my heart would leap out of my chest and I had a couple of panic attacks (that was honestly the worst part). A few times legs would buckle and I'd lose my balance (twice I had to grab onto a table to not fall over). I lost 30 pounds in about 2 months (putting me underweight on BMI) and my hair started falling out (and did for about a year). and while I think this was anxiety attack rather than PTSD, it was HORRIBLE.
PTSD develops after a terrifying ordeal that involved physical harm or the threat of physical harm. The person who develops PTSD may have been the one who was harmed, the harm may have happened to a loved one, or the person may have witnessed a harmful event that happened to loved ones or strangers. PTSD was first brought to public attention in relation to war veterans, but it can result from a variety of traumatic incidents, such as mugging, rape, torture, being kidnapped or held captive, child abuse, car accidents, train wrecks, plane crashes, bombings, or natural disasters such as floods or earthquakes
PTSD was first brought to public attention in relation to war veterans, but it can result from a variety of traumatic incidents, such as mugging, rape, torture, being kidnapped or held captive, child abuse, car accidents, train wrecks, plane crashes, bombings, or natural disasters such as floods or earthquakes
PTSD affects about 7.7 million American adults, but it can occur at any age, including childhood. Women are more likely to develop PTSD than men, and there is some evidence that susceptibility to the disorder may run in families. Anyone can get PTSD at any age. This includes war veterans and survivors of physical and sexual assault, abuse, accidents, disasters, and many other serious events. Not everyone with PTSD has been through a dangerous event. Some people get PTSD after a friend or family member experiences danger or is harmed. The sudden, unexpected death of a loved one can also cause PTSD.
Anyone can get PTSD at any age. This includes war veterans and survivors of physical and sexual assault, abuse, accidents, disasters, and many other serious events.
Not everyone with PTSD has been through a dangerous event. Some people get PTSD after a friend or family member experiences danger or is harmed. The sudden, unexpected death of a loved one can also cause PTSD.
Latest from NIMH. I would contend that an affair constitutes abuse or other serious event.
Risk factors for PTSD include: Living through dangerous events and traumas Having a history of mental illness Getting hurt Seeing people hurt or killed Feeling horror, helplessness, or extreme fear Having little or no social support after the event Dealing with extra stress after the event, such as loss of a loved one, pain and injury, or loss of a job or home.
Also from the National Institute for Mental Health. The last three might sound familiar to many of the BS here. The definition you are using is outdated. I mean no disrespect, but there are other causes for PTSD.
A little background. I am a Critical Incident Stress Debriefer. I'm the guy who the firefighters and cops talk to after an *incident*. Actually anyone who has been through a major trauma, either as a witness or a *participant*. I personally had a 19 yo girl die in my arms from a flailed chest/severed arm. I pinched the axillary closed with my fingers for the 30 minute ambulance ride to the hospital.
I haven't been on the sharp end, but I think I can talk PTSD. Believe me, a BS can suffer PTSD.
ETA littlemrsV0813 sorry for the t/j. Yes, of course you can suffer PTSD.
Strength
[This message edited by 5454real at 1:06 AM, November 19th (Tuesday)]
As an infidelity "survivor" I've experienced the flashbacks, the panic attacks and the deep depression but I don't believe this to be PTSD, coming back from deployments I've had issues with settling back in, again I don't believe this to be PTSD. I am however responding in a normal way to difficult situations.
I understand the need to label our responses, it neatens things up, makes s normal, relatable and fixable but I've also seen first hand true PTSD and am wary of labelling a traumatic response as such.
