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Newest Member: octo8 (61864)

User Topic: The greatest text message in the world
♂ 39885
Member # 39885
Default  Posted: 11:06 AM, November 18th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

As I packed up the rest of my stuff on Saturday and prepared to leave the house for the last time I reached out to a co worker. Her M ended last year after 11 years. She cant confirm an A but in a nutshell her H told her point blank that he didn't want to be married anymore. She's been an understanding friend and we talk at work occasionally.

I texted that, as a peer who has lived through packing up her belongings and moved from her marital home that I now can understand the pain she must've felt and that seeing her and the life she is building for herself was an inspiration to me and that I drew strength and comfort seeing her on the other side of the journey I am just beginning.

She didn't respond for a while. I thought she maybe misunderstood my message or it was maybe too mushy and she didn't want to deal with it. A few hours later she responded with the most beautiful words I have ever read:

"I know that you're going thru hell right now, but if anything I've said to you makes it easier or gives you strength then everything I have dealt with is worth it."

I barely know this person. Thank you JK

Divorced 7/11/14. New Beginning on the Gulf of Mexico. It's real nice.

Posts: 799 | Registered: Jul 2013 | From: The beach.
♀ 38647
Member # 38647
Default  Posted: 11:41 AM, November 18th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

Beautiful and touching. A true friend!

Me 36
WH 40
Married 10 years, 2 great kids

Posts: 65 | Registered: Mar 2013 | From: Florida
♀ 33226
Member # 33226
Default  Posted: 11:53 AM, November 18th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

What a lovely message. ((((sunsets)))) (((jk)))

You can call me NIK

And never grow a wishbone, daughter, where your backbone ought to be.
― Sarah McMane

Posts: 40250 | Registered: Aug 2011
solus sto
♀ 30989
Member # 30989
Default  Posted: 3:58 PM, November 18th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

That made me misty.

It was very kind of you to reach out to her, as well. It's nice to feel as though someone has benefited from your example.

BS-me, 55; WX-irrelevant
Divorced after an eternity
"So much for the past and present. The future is called 'perhaps,' which is the only possible thing to call the future. And the important thing is not to let that scare you." Tenn

Posts: 15348 | Registered: Jan 2011 | From: midwest
♀ 18442
Member # 18442
Default  Posted: 7:20 PM, November 18th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

wow what a kind hearted person. you both will be in better places one day :)

6/07 EX had MANY affairs.
FALSE Reconciles. cheats again. D 5/09. 2 kids. I have 100% custody of. ex rarely sees.
2017: still trying to pick pieces up

Posts: 819 | Registered: Mar 2008
♂ 40268
Member # 40268
Default  Posted: 8:03 PM, November 18th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage


"respect? you don't deserve it, you won't get any from me unless you earn it"

Posts: 1030 | Registered: Aug 2013 | From: nyc
♀ 40898
Member # 40898
Default  Posted: 9:22 PM, November 18th (Monday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

me(BS)-34 him(WS)-32 DS-15
Married 15 years
Blindsided with divorce 07-12-13
DD-08-1-13 OW-40ish,married 20 yrs, with 4 kids she abandoned
Divorcing and trying to move one tiny step forward at a time.
Divorced: Jan 27,2015 (Ds 16th BDay)He rem

Posts: 118 | Registered: Oct 2013
♂ 16953
Member # 16953
Default  Posted: 2:01 AM, November 19th (Tuesday), 2013View ProfileEdit MessagePrivate MessageHomepage

One of the best things that has come out of this nightmare is my newfound ability for compassion. Prior to this infidelity bullshit I really was too wrapped up in my own little world to notice that people are hurting, all the time for many different reasons. When I joined SI I was astonished that complete strangers reached out to me with advice, support and a kick in the ass when needed. One member who happened to work in the same area as I reached out in person. We met and she kind of took me under her wing. She kept in touch with me often and helped me out greatly. And in return she got absolutely nothing back. She helped me just to pay it forward. She is one of the reasons I still post. I like to think that I can help out a fellow survivor with whatever I can offer. I have an old friend that I recently reached out to in real life. I had not seen her in decades. But through FB we became friendly again. Nothing personal or anything like that. Usually just liking a post or something to that affect. Last year I noticed a change in her online demeanor. This person went from a cheerful positive woman to a withdrawn dark person. Naturally my infidelity radar kicked in and I sent her a message alluding to what I felt was going on. I offered her support and told her everything was going to be OK. What I suspected was 100% true as her H of many years left her for an old GF he hooked up with online. She was devastated. We have spoken many times in the last year. I directed her here, but I don't know if she posts or not. But she calls when she needs advice or to vent. And I'm glad to help her just like I was helped when I needed it. she is about a year in and heading for D. Her WH is a complete dick and is trying to starve her out. But she is getting stronger everyday and I'd like to think I helped. I get a feeling of satisfaction from helping others. And it has spilled over into other areas of my life that are not infidelity related. So when your healed and happy you can also reach out to others. You will find its not only a good thing to do for others, but yourself as well.

You cant eat soup with chopsticks.

Posts: 6851 | Registered: Nov 2007
Topic Posts: 8

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