I had the same experience. In my case, he was also trying to pass off OW as his new
g.f. at the same time. I only outed it to specific folks in our circle, and let them do the rest.
I would advise you to let your friends do the majority of the talking for you. Your XH will soon enough out himself. It's hard hiding the sort of crazy that having an A entails. You can already see it by what he's saying regarding your D. Even dumb people can suss out what's really going on.