I have done it a bunch of times. I try to keep cool, but sometimes I slip up and it is expected.
Once we had an exchange about him taking one of our kids because the other one was sick and the well one was bored and called him. He was going to come get her, but then said something about "oh, to be clear you want me to take her on YOUR day?" I got freaked out thinking he was going to try and use it against me somehow so I said "forget it." Then he texted me 3 x saying, "let me help, please, what did I say, etc?" Then he sent email telling me I am putting the kids in the middle and using them as messengers, blah, blah, blah. I did not respond to any of them.
Later that night after a hard, hard day with the kids I was having a glass of wine. I texted him back saying, "Don't worry about it, I have taken care of sick kids plenty of times while you were out fucking whores." I shouldn't have done that...but oh well. Shit happens when someone shits on you.
I found though that like you it did just make me feel bad, I was behaving in a way that wasn't my true self. Slowly over time I stopped lashing out at him.
It takes work though and the sides of my NC wagon were very low early on so I kept falling off at the smallest bump . Now when I see an email from him (dick is dragging out the financial separation so unfortunately cant go completely NC for the moment) it has morphed from red rage to a 'meh' irritation.
All of it takes time though. Keep on keeping on, chin up, tomorrow is a new day, etc
One day we will reach a point that they just aren't worth the effort it takes to type a response.
"I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel". –Maya Angelou
It does happen a lot in the beginning. Then you notice that you get covered in the stench of them each time you fling your shit at them. I got to a point where my shit deserved better than to be flung at those whores.
Yes. My shit deserves better.
LOL @ sleepless.
